The buildings stretch high towards the sky. My chest tightens, butI’m here.
In the same city as Jude.
The thought alone makes my heart pound again, like my body recognizes his proximity even if my mind is trying to stay calm. I wonder how close he is. Miles? Blocks? Is he awake right now? Is he hurting?
No one speaks for the entire ride, which I'm kind of grateful for. I think at least the three of us are processing the fact that we're here.
When we finally turn onto a long, winding forest road, the weight on my shoulders seems to fall off. The dense trees close in on both sides, and the noise of the city disappears completely, replaced by quiet.Realquiet.
I didn’t realize how badly I needed that.
Then the car slows.
The driveway opens up suddenly, and my breath catches.
A cabin sits ahead of us, tucked against a small river that glints faintly through the trees. It's two stories with wide windows and warm wood, the forest protecting it on all sides.
It’s beautiful. Cozy, even.
We step out into crisp air, my boots crunching softly against the snowy gravel driveway. For the first time since we landed, I inhale as much air into my lungs as I can. I always tell my patients to do this whenever they're attempting to calm down. Slow, deep breaths can trick your body into relaxing. Your heart will slow, and your breath will find its strength instead of shaking so much.
Inside, the cabin is warm and welcoming, with wood floors, soft lighting, and a stone fireplace. It smells like pine and clean linen.
“Rooms are upstairs,” Rafe says, already shrugging out of his jacket. “Micah and Heather, you’re together. Emma—yours is at the end of the hall.”
Heather squeezes my hand as she passes me, her eyes still tired but steadier now. Micah yawns like he hasn’t been absolutely traumatized by witnessing a murder twelve hours ago. But then again, he's probably seen worse.
When I get to my room, I let out a long exhale. It's quiet and simple, with a large bed dressed in white, a dresser, and a chair by the window. I set my bag down on the mattress and walk straight to the glass. Outside, the river moves lazily past the cabin, trees stretching endlessly beyond it, their reflections rippling in the water. I wrap my arms around myself.
This close.
I glance back at the bed, my heart twisting with hope so sharp it almost hurts.
Soon,I think.
Soon he’ll be here.
I picture Jude stretched out on the bed with that beautiful, boyish grin that I fell in love with. I picture him reaching to pull me beside him, enveloping me in his scent.
I cling to that image.
Because when I think of that version of him, it makes me really fucking sad. I don't think I'll ever get that again. But who knows? Perhaps I'll be different soon, too. I can feel it happening inside me. There's a rage and a desperation that will likely drive me to do anything for that man.
I head back downstairs, my socks soft on the wood. As I pass the room Micah and Heather took, the door is still shut. Water runsfaintly through the wall—probably enjoying a nice hot shower together. I don’t blame them.
The smell of coffee hits me as I reach the bottom step.
Nico has completely taken over the dining room table, with two laptops open and cables snaking everywhere, like he’s building a control center. He’s typing fast, eyes locked on the screen. Adela stands at the refrigerator, one hip popped, looking through what appears to be a takeout menu taped to the stainless steel door.
“Ugh, what a weird day,” she mumbles. “Wine first thing in the morning, and coffee with dinner.” She then rubs her temples. “Fuck me. I drank too much.”
“But you weren’t anxious, were you?” Nico asks with a smile.
“No,” she groans.
Rafe is by the sliding glass doors, phone pressed to his ear, staring out at the river. And Kieran is sprawled on the couch, one boot planted right on the coffee table, scrolling through his phone. His shoulder-length brown hair is tied in a low, messy bun again.
“You could really fucking help, you know,” Nico snaps without looking up.
