I kiss him. It starts soft and filled with gratitude. Then it deepens into desperation. I want him to know how in love with him I am. How much I appreciate his willingness to be so kind and gentle with me. He responds instantly, the guitar slipping from his lap to the floor with a soft thud as he pulls me closer. We sink back into the warm blankets. He’s between my thighs, and I feel safe, wanted, and loved.
Jude breaks the kiss, his forehead resting against mine. “Em…you were literallyjusthaving a panic attack.”
I grin, my hands sliding down his back to grip the waistband of his pajama pants. I tug him closer, rolling my hips, and feel the hard, thick length of him straining against the soft fabric. A low groan rumbles from him.
“Please,” I whisper, nipping at his bottom lip. “This is the second-best way to help distract me.”
“First, being my lovely voice?” he asks, a smirk in his voice.
“Exactly.”
~*~
My eyes open, and I’m back on the edge of my bed, my heart finally slowing. Huh, even the memory of him soothing me helps. I swallow hard and reach for another sweater, folding it neatly before placing it into the suitcase.
“Okay,” I whisper to the empty room. And I zip the bag closed.
Chapter eight
JUDE GRAVES
My knee bounces in the backseat as we pass through the iron gates. Tall trees line the driveway, their branches arching overhead like a tunnel, leaves brushing against one another in the breeze. Nolan is driving, one hand loose on the wheel, the other resting casually on the door. He looks far too relaxed for where the hell we’re going.
“So,” I mutter, breaking the silence. “What does Alexei actually want to talk about? Did he tell you?”
Nolan shrugs. “Hard to say.” He glances at me in the rearview mirror. “Could be anything.”
I scoff quietly. I want to tell him how fucking stupid he is. Alexei could offer to fuck him in the ass, and Nolan would bendright over for him. Adriana sits beside me, legs crossed, posture perfect. She’s…different today. When she speaks, her voice is a little softer than usual, like she’s decided not to sharpen it into the weapon she usually does. It’s strange how easily that happened. Like I finally surrendered and gave her what she wanted, and it relaxed her. The thought makes my chest feel weird.
Nolan slows the car as the massive mansion comes into view. It’s all glass and pale stone, with security standing in a line near the front door. I sigh and lean my head back against the seat, then turn to the window. My reflection stares back at me in the glass—eyes tired, face already distant. Something prickles at the back of my neck. I don’t know why. I exhale slowly.Just another meeting,I tell myself.
The inside of the mansion doesn’t look like a place where bad things happen. That’s the beautiful lie of it, I suppose. Everything gleams, from the polished stone floors to the almost full-glass walls that look out over a winter-gray forest. There’s art in every room that would fool most people into thinking this man has some semblance of a soul. The air smells like some kind of candle I can’t quite place. Floral?
I keep my shoulders loose and my face blank. I’ve learned how to do that around these men. Alexei sits across from me, long legs crossed, drink untouched in his hand. He studies me the way a collector studies a new piece in his collection. I suppose I am a new piece in his fucking collection.
“So,” he says mildly, swirling the amber liquid. “Moscow looks good on you guys, I’d say.”
Nolan shifts beside me. Adriana sits stiffly on the couch opposite, her hands folded in her lap, eyes flicking to the windows and back. She looks…uneasy. She always does around Alexei. She’s usually a cocky little bitch when it’s just Nolan. But Alexei? He scares her.
“I’m definitely feeling refreshed,” Nolan laughs. “Russia has the most incredible women.”
Alexei smiles. It doesn’t reach his eyes. “Ah. Yes, we do.” His gaze slides back to me. “And you, Jude?” he asks. “How are you and your lady adjusting?”
I refrain from cringing. Instead, I lift one shoulder. “It’s beautiful here.” A beat. Then Alexei laughs softly.
“Good,” he says. Something about the way he says it makes my pulse kick up a notch. He was intimidating in the States. But home? Jesus. He sets his glass aside and rises smoothly to his feet. “Now, the reason for summoning you today. Come,” he says.
Nolan frowns, but doesn’t argue as he motions for us to follow. We move through the house, past rooms that feel staged rather than lived in. I couldn’t imagine him enjoying most of these serene spaces, anyway. The temperature drops as we head down some narrow stairs, the light dimming. Every instinct in my body is suddenly screaming at me to turn around and run. But I can’t.
We stop in front of a steel, unmarked door. Adriana hesitates. “What is—”
He opens it anyway. The room beyond descends into shadow. “After you,” he says pleasantly. My jaw tightens. I glance at Nolan, and he gives me a look that’s meant to reassure but doesn’t. I step forward, body on alert when the door seals shut. It’s not colder down here, but it’s definitelyheavier. The fluorescent lights hum overhead, and concrete walls seal us in from every angle. There are chains along the far wall and a drain in the floor. Nothing else. No furniture.
That’s when I understand.I turn slowly, dread creeping through my body.
Alexei takes his time crossing the room, moving with an obnoxious confidence. Nolan shifts beside me, tension rolling offof him now. Adriana has gone still, her hands clenched together so tightly her knuckles are white.
“What’s this room?” Nolan asks casually, though his tone betrays him. He’s nervous.
