He glances down for half a second, and I see the preview flash across the screen.
MICAH
Adriana and Nolan are dragging us to Portland again Friday night.
The muscle in Jude’s jaw tightens. He exhales slowly, staring out the windshield as the light ahead turns red.
I look away quickly, pretending I didn’t read it. “Everything okay?”
He rubs a hand down his face, his voice quieter now. “It’s nothing.”
But I can tell it’s not.
We pull up to my place, and he puts the car in park. I turn toward him, about to thank him for the ride, but the words catch in my throat. He’s watching me, his eyes dark and unreadable in the soft glow from the dashboard.
“Thanks for dinner,” I manage finally, my voice a little too soft.
He nods once, a muscle flickering in his cheek. “Of course.”
I open the door, the cool night air brushing against my face. For a second, I think he might say something else, but he just gives me a small, tired smile.
“Goodnight, Jude.”
“Night, Em.”
I close the door, and the car idles for a few seconds before he drives off down the street. I stand there until his taillights disappear, my arms folded tight around myself. It’s a lovely night, but that text from Micah lingers in the back of my mind.
I really hope he’ll be okay.
~ A memory ~
The summer night is warm and perfect. I’ve just graduated from high school, and everything ahead of me feels bright and promising. Especially with the incredible man sitting beside me on his parents’ dock.
It’s the same dock where I met him. The same warped planks beneath our bare feet, the same soft creak when we shift our weight. And now it’s the place we always come back to for solace and deep thoughts.
“You’re beautiful, you know,” Jude says, laughing like someone who’s had one too many drinks.
I roll my eyes. “You’re an idiot.”
He leans in anyway, breath sweet with rum and Coke, and when he kisses me, he loses his balance and tumbles into me. We’re laughing, kissing, tangled up in each other and the night. The moonhangs full and heavy over the ocean, turning the gentle waves silver.
“Dirty Paws”by Of Monsters and Men suddenly crackles through the little speaker, and Jude lights up instantly. He grabs my hand and hauls me to my feet, bottle of rum swinging looselyfrom his other hand. We dance badly, drunkenly, swaying and spinning on the dock. The world could come to an end right now, and I’d be happy. When we sing the chorus together and dance around each other, my heart soars.
Halfway through the song, he sets the rum down and pulls me into him, kissing me hard. It’s urgent and messy and full of heat. My head feels light. I’m done with school, and our future is ours to imagine. But not tonight.
“I want to dance to this song at our wedding one day,” he breathes against my mouth.
My chest tightens. I want to cry because I love him so much, because it all feels like it’s just right there.
“Ugh, you guys!”
We break apart to see his sister, Vanessa, standing near the dock, her face twisted in exaggerated disgust. “Mom and Dad are on their way home, perv.”
Jude just laughs. “Em’s staying the night. It’s fine. They already know she’s here.”
Vanessa smiles despite herself and heads back inside. “Be quieter this time, please.”
But when Jude kisses me again, slower and rougher, I know we won’t.
