But after playing with the button of my cut-off jeans for what felt like a whole minute, he pulled himselfaway.
“God, babe,” he racked his hands through his hair and looked away from me. “I really want to… sosobad.”
“Then let’s do it,” I said breathlessly, moving to pull him back down on top of me.
He hesitated, looking pained. “I don’t want to when I’mleaving.”
My heart paused. “What happened to Mr. No Regrets,” I said urgently, trying to fix it. “Mr. Life is Short. I won’t regret this. I promise.”
He was shaking his headno.
“It doesn’t feel right to leave right after. How about we do it when we know we won’t be apart? How about when I come back to get you next year? Will you wait for me?” he pleaded in the dark.
I would’ve been disappointed if it weren’t for the fact that it looked like he was beating himself up over the situation.
I pulled him forward to kiss me again. “It’s a date.”
I kept that moment at the lake in my heart.
Because laying there in that tent, listening to the lake lazily ripple up on the beach, was when I realized I’d go anywhere in the world to be with Nick Johns.
SECOND PERIOD
One year later
August 2010
23. Sav
I was coaching my last noontime Learn to Skate shift of the summer when I spotted Nick and Griff walking into the rink for the first time in a year.
I felt a jittery happiness course through my entire body as I watched their manly figures bro-hug-slap Craig on theback.
I forced myself to turn my attention back to the little skaters in front of me… And I couldn’t help but laugh. I loved when little kids looked down at their skates and became mesmerized by how fast they were going. I caught one of my little guys under the arms and lifted him up before he crashed into the boards.
“Alright, guys! Last drill of the day!” I called out to my group of six and started moving backwards down the ice so I could facethem.
“Okay, lift one leg up just like this and balance!” I yelled, directing them to practice their one-foot glides. The other coaches usually said, ‘left foot’ or ‘right foot’, but that always screwed me up. I’d get stuck thinking about which foot it was according to them because it’d technically be the opposite for me… and it was always a little too humbling when a four-year-old corrected my lefts and rights. So, I just avoided the whole predicament by telling kids to choose one foot first, and then I’d say, ‘okay, now lift theother!’
I smiled as I watched a little guy who reminded me of Duke sticking his tongue out as he glided forward on a wobbly foot.
By the time we made it back to the boards, Nick and Griff were watching from the stands, and I told my kids to wave at them.
As soon as the clock hit 12:50pm, I quickly listed off what my little skaters had to work on, then turned and skate-ran off the ice.
As soon as my skates hit the rubber-matted floor, I ran full speed into Nick’s arms. He quickly picked me up and swung me around.
“God, I missed you baby,” he said into my hair, and I could detect a smile in his words.
As soon as he put me back down, I spotted Griff, leaning against the cinder-block wall with his ankles crossed and a crooked tight-lipped smile on his face.
As I walked over to give him a hug, he said, “Hey Sav,” and I stopped dead in my tracks.
“Nooo!” I whined and put a gloved hand to my mouth.
He nodded and chuckled wryly. “Ask whose fault it was,” he said calmly.
“Who did this to you?” I demanded and pointed a finger at him. Because standing there, he had one less front tooth. I was immediately upset for him. I loved his smile. I felt Nick shrink away from me.
