I’m the belligerent baby mom who lives in his house rent-free.
It’s like someone finally opened my eyes.
And now for the kicker - that man stood in my kitchen (well, his kitchen) and INFORMED ME that he and Rebel had gone to Vegas for her birthday (don’t even get me started on my birthdays while I was with him) and that they GOT HITCHED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Rebel
is
now
my
son’s
stepmother.
Barf.
His tone was apologetic, like he was waiting for me to fall apart at the news, but also expectant in a way, like he wanted me to congratulate him?
Luckily, the good Lord gave me the strength to look him in the eye without grimacing and say, “Good for you.” :D
And then I told him I’ll be moving out.
Can you believe it?! :D
It just came to me, the clarity. He is moving on, as is his right, and I am stuck here and... I don’t want to be anymore.
Thanks to you, I’m already doing better with being outside, and giving myself this deadline means I guess I’ll finally take you up on that offer of getting me a job with the club, then.
Sorry for the word vomit. Call me when you get this.
M.
“Let everything happen to you: beauty and terror. Just keep going. No feeling is final”.
Rilke
Chapter 12
Hawk
“The last item on the agenda is reminding everyone that your attendance is expected at the party this afternoon,” Bev announces cheerfully.
Red squeals, which earns her one of my cop glares.
“You guys better cool it today. I don’t want Marissa to be overwhelmed.”
What worries me more is that there’s a chance that she might bail on her plans to move at the last minute.
Red’s bracelets jingle as she waves me off rather impatiently. “You mean you don’t want her to know how obsessed you are?”
There’s no point in lying to the people in this room. “Exactly. Would that be doable?”
Bev presses her palm onto her chest, like the mothers in movies when their prom-going son walks down the stairs, but Cash only rolls his eyes and asks, “Is that all? Some of us have work to do.”
Everyone gathers their stuff, and Squid comes up to me. “Walk you out?”
