“I’m sorry that shit came back to bite us,” I tell Phantom. “You specifically warned me not to let that happen.”
Phantom shrugs. “She’s one of us now, I’m thinking. Ain’t she?” He stares at me through intensely dark eyes. “We protect our own.”
I nod, finally admitting it out loud. To my brothers. To myself. “She’s mine,” I tell them, even though I’m not sure I’ve said the words to her. “She’s one of us.”
Phantom nods, then claps me on the shoulder. He gets in his truck and heads back toward the compound, leaving Shadow and me alone. I can tell my brother is shaken, pissed.
“Let it go,” I tell him. “You got scammed. It happens to the best of us.”
Shadow shakes his head and scrubs his hands over his head. “This is fucking with me, man,” he says. “I thought I knew her. I did the research, the site visits, observation. How’d I get it so, so wrong?”
“I don’t know,” I tell him. “But does it matter? You got preyed on. Mad Dog set out to scam us out of money because he thought the Heat was an easy markdue to something I did. If anyone should feel like shit, I should.”
Shadow’s lost in thought. I can understand how he feels. He did something he thought was right, was good for the club. And it had disastrous consequences. There’s a chance the Hellfires club won’t make it through losing both Anthony and Mad Dog. But if they do, Mad Dog’s gonna come back and be out for blood.
“I’m gonna go home and fuck my wife,” he finally says, unbuttoning the sleeves of his pink shirt.
“Change those fucking shoes,” I holler at him. “But save them. I might want to borrow them for my next knitting circle.”
Shadow gives me the finger and grins, then peels out of the lot.
I’ve been thinking a lot the last week that I’ve been alone with Claire. About what she means to me. What Aurora means to me.
I may have told Phantom she’s mine, but I don’t think I’ll be able to give myself to someone until I close a few more doors to my past.
“Table for one, sir?”The teenage hostess looks me up and down and then points to the counter. “Or do you want a seat at the counter?”
“Put me in Val’s section.” I check the time on my phone.
“She’s gonna go off shift in about ten minutes,” theteenager says, looking confused. “Do you still want to be seated in her section?”
I nod. “Yep.”
She grabs a menu. “Right this way.”
I follow her, keeping my eyes on the floor. The busy carpet gives me something to focus on while I steady my nerves.
As soon as the girl seats me, I open the menu and start scanning the pages, even though I know there’s no way I could eat right now.
“Hi there, hon, what can I get started for you?” A glass of water and a napkin-wrapped roll of silverware are placed on the table in front of me. It’s obvious she’s using her work voice, and she hasn’t noticed me behind the menu.
I’m suddenly overcome with nerves. My hands start to shake, and I suck my lower lip into my mouth and bite down hard. When I don’t say anything, she leans closer.
She sees me then. Really sees me.
“Ethan? Oh, honey. I never expected to see you again.”
There is a catch in Mom’s voice, and I put down the menu, unable to say a word.
“Can you sit?” I motion toward the opposite side of the booth.
She nods. “Let me clock out. I’ll be back in two minutes. Please, honey. Wait here for me.”
I’m not going anywhere, but I nod to let her know I heard her. Once she’s gone, I’m so frantic and frazzled, Idon’t know what to do. I pick up my phone and send Claire a text.
Me: I’m at the diner. Came to talk to my mother. It’s been twelve years.
I get a response immediately.
