“Speaking of,” I say, “when do kids start using the toilet?”
Claire laughs and shakes her head. “It’s gonna be a while,” she says.
Then she turns in her seat and looks at Aurora. “Baby, you ready?”
“Mama.”
I let myself out of the truck and grab the last of Claire’s bags. She unbuckles the baby seat and brings Aurora in the carrier, while I grab the base so she can put it in any car she needs it in the next time she gets a ride someplace.
Every step up to the front door feels huge, like I’m walking into a wild, uncertain future. I’m nervous. I won’t lie. I promised to protect her, and now she’ll be under her own roof. And the idea that she’s not just down the hall anymore sends my guts into a tailspin.
I have to shake it off, though, so I hand her the keys and watch as she unlocks the door. She shoves the door open and walks in, then looks back to see why I’m not following.
I give her a grin. “Can I come in?”
She plays along, shaking her head as if she’s thinking about it. “Hm, I don’t normally let strange men into my place, but I’ll make an exception.” She lowers her voice and pretends to cover one of Aurora’s ears. “Because you have such a nice ass.”
I laugh and follow her in, and I lock the door behind me. We spend about half an hour setting up the last of her things.
“Can you stay a while?” she asks after the books from Shadow and Violet have been put away. “I have a little tiny surprise for you.”
Something in her voice sends a shiver up the back of my spine and then down to my dick. Claire goes off tothe kitchen to make dinner for Aurora, and I follow her, carrying Aurora on one hip.
“I don’t like surprises,” I tell her.
It’s the truth. But just like the day I met her—which was a huge fucking surprise, by the way—maybe I should be a little more open to the unexpected. I lean down and kiss her bare shoulder. “But maybe just this once.”
She rolls her head back toward me, and I kiss the top of her hair. Her hair smells so damned delicious, it makes my mouth water. I want to kiss her, hold her, and yet, I have to hold back. I’m giving her this place, and she needs to turn a page. Find herself and her future.
I assume that future is gonna go in a very different direction than the path I’m on.
The less messy I can make this for myself and my heart, the better.
I’m bouncing Aurora on my hip when there is a firm knock at the door. Claire turns and faces me, a wide grin on her beautiful face. I take a moment to just look at her. Really look at her. Gone are the bruises and the matted hair. The filthy clothes and the fear.
The woman before me is a vision. Someone I think—no, I know—I could learn to love. If I were the kind of man who could ever love someone.
Claire bounces past me on her bare feet to answer the door, while I grab a piece of sliced banana and hand it to Aurora.
“Looks good, kid,” I tell her. “You wanna share?”
I open my mouth, but Aurora stuffs her fingers into her mouth and chomps loudly on a banana.
“Gotta respect the appetite,” I say, nodding.
Something catches my ear, though, as I hear Claire chatting up someone in the entryway. A sudden flare of worry crests through my gut, and a protective instinct, soul-deep and pounding against the back of my ribs like a drumbeat, has me holding tighter to Aurora as I walk to the front door.
What greets me immediately are two things that my shocked brain processes at the same time. The smell of diner food and a very familiar voice. It comes to me through water, over years and miles and memories. I can only hear her part of the conversation, but I can hardly make out what she’s saying over the ringing in my ears.
“Savage is here right now,” Claire is saying. “No, that’s not Savage. That kid’s name is Tank. I know, it’s cute, right? He’s a sweetheart. You’ve never met him? Why don’t you come in and meet him?”
Claire turns to me, and everything suddenly shifts into slow motion. Val from the diner walks through Claire’s front door. I see her white hair first, the cut so familiar after all these years. She’s wearing real clothes, not her diner uniform. She looks thicker, which is good. She’s put on some weight. She’s wearing blue jeans and a light blue sweater, a pair of glasses hanging around her neck from a chain.
She takes one look at my face, the baby in my arms,and then my face again. She freezes. “Ethan?” she asks, her hands flying to her mouth.
Claire cocks her chin and looks confused. Her eyes shift from Val to me. I see recognition cross her face. She knows my real name is Ethan, and yet it’s clear she has no idea how Val knows that.
I swallow hard and make an impossible choice in the span of under a second. First, I lower my face to Aurora’s little head and kiss her lightly. Her baby hair is so soft, I almost change my mind. Is there nothing we wouldn’t do for our kids? For our parents? I can’t, though. I fucking can’t.
