"Then that's all that matters. The rest you figure out as you go." He pulls into the warehouse parking lot. "Just don't fuck it up."
"I'll try not to."
I climb out, grab my truck keys from where I'd left them earlier, and drive home. My small rented room feels even smaller tonight. Empty. Lonely.
But as I collapse into bed, my phone buzzes with a text.
**Joanna:** *I finally made it to bed. Had to take a shower before. Daisy's still asleep. Thank you for tonight. For everything.*
I stare at the message for a long moment before typing back: *Thank you for giving me a chance. Sleep well.*
**Joanna:** *You too. See you soon?*
*Yeah. Soon.*
I fall asleep with my phone in my hand and a smile on my face.
One month later
"You're pacing."
"I'm not pacing."
"Danny, you're literally wearing a path in my carpet right now."
I stop mid-stride and look at Erin. She's sitting on her couch, seven months pregnant with her third kid, trying not to laugh at me. Failing.
"I'm nervous," I admit.
"I can see that. You've been nervous for three days."
Three days. That's how long I've known about today. About meeting Daisy. Joanna had asked me a week after we made it official, after I'd asked her to be my girlfriend and she'd said yes and we'd celebrated by fucking twice that day, once in her car again and once in my room.
I called Erin that night. Told her everything. From the moment I first saw Joanna cleaning the pit to walking her to her car to the storage room to the fight to the sex to asking her to be mine. All of it.
Erin had cried. Happy tears, she'd insisted. Told me I deserved this. Deserved happiness and love and someone who saw past the violence to the man underneath.
I still don't know if I believe that. But I'm trying.
This past month with Joanna has been... everything. We've gone out when we can. Mostly late at night after work, quick dinners or drives or just sitting in one of our cars talking for hours. She's told me about her ex, about Daisy, about her dreams for the bakery. I've told her about prison, about learning to fight, about my sister and her kids.
We've fucked in my room, in her car, once in the storage room at the warehouse after everyone left. Can't keep our hands off each other.
But this is different. This is meeting her daughter. The most important person in Joanna's life. The person I need to prove myself to even more than Joanna herself.
"What if she doesn't like me?" I ask Erin.
"She's three, Danny. She likes everyone."
"What if I'm too big? Too scary?"
"Then you make yourself smaller. You know how to do that." Erin struggles to her feet, waddles over to me. "You're going to be great. You're good with kids. My two love you."
"They're seven and five. They can handle me. Daisy's three."
"And she's going to love you because you're going to be gentle and patient and exactly what she needs." Erin puts her hand on my arm. "You've got this. I promise."
I want to believe her. Want to believe I can do this. That I can walk into Joanna's apartment and meet this little girl and not somehow fuck it up.
