But apparently, that is a luxury I can’t afford anymore.
Lev is speaking, steady as always, outlining options for recruitment. My head aches, my temples pounding as the words around me blur into a dull hum. I pinch the bridge of my nose, fighting to stay present. It’s a wonder I’ve made it this far at all, let alone had any semblance of opinion whenever addressed.
That’s when Alisa opens her mouth. “Perhaps this would go smoother if ourPakhanwere actually paying attention to the matters at hand instead of daydreaming.”
The room stills.
My eyes snaps open. Every muscle in my body goes tight, heat roaring through my chest.
“What did you just say?” My voice is low and dangerous, the kind of pissed off that usually makes most rethink their life choices and recalibrate.
But not her.
Alisa smirks, leaning back in her chair, arms crossing over her large chest as she tilts her head in a curious way. “I said, perhaps your mind is elsewhere. Maybe mourning leaving your little girlfriend back in the States is distracting you from the work that needs doing.”
The words detonate something inside me. Before I even think straight, I’ve drawn my gun and stood up from my chair. The metallic click of the safety disengaging echoes through the chamber, making everyone freeze in place.
I aim it straight at her forehead.
No one moves. No one even breathes. The only sound is the faint hum of the lights above us and the rapid pounding of my own blood flooding through my ears.
“Say that again,” I snarl. “I dare you.”
Alisa tilts her head, her smile widening though there is a slight visible sliver of fear reflecting in her eyes. They dart down to the gun and to where my finger hovers over the trigger. Her shoulders grow rigid with unease. “That your little whore has ruined your focus. I suggest you figure out a way to get rid of her to help ease that burden.”
My finger tightens on the trigger, nearly pulling it. Imeanit—one twitch, and her blood will paint the table. I’m so tempted to, just to see the look on Luka’s face when I take out his oldest confidant before turning it on him next.
It would be a satisfying end for the both of them.
“Pakhan,” Lev hisses in warning.
I barely hear him.
Alisa’s mouth twitches. She knows exactly what she’s doing. She wants me to break and show the others that I can be rattled. Unfortunately for her, my other five lieutenants are well aware of my shortcomings. They saw it firsthand while we were overseas and were all smart enough to decide to take the knowledge to the grave with them.
Lev suddenly slams into me from the side, hard enough to knock me off my feet. The gun jerks out of my hand but not before a shot explodes from the barrel. It hits harmlessly into the ceiling. Plaster rains down as Lev wrestles me to the ground, his weight crushing me before I can flip us over.
“Out!” he bellows to the others.
Chairs scrape, boots pound across the hard floor. No one hesitates as they scramble to leave, clearly anxious to get away from their unstable leader. Not to mention, no one wants to be caught between thePakhanand his second when fists are about to fly. The room empties in seconds, the heavy door slamming shut behind them.
Then Lev and I are left alone.
I snarl, shoving against him, my fist connecting with his jaw. He grunts but doesn’t falter from keeping me pinned to the floor. His own fist slams into my diaphragm, the air bursting out of my lungs in one solid pull. I cough hard, forcing my lungs to inflate as I’m twisted around to roll me on my back. I drive my knee up before he can get me there, though, catch his thigh hard enough to make him stagger.
We trade punches, each hit ringing through my bones, each impact another outlet for the rage that’s been festering for weeks inside me.
Lev doesn’t hold back—he never has. His fists are blunt instruments, punishing and relentless as they strike me. His knuckles split against my cheekbone, his lip bleeds from a sharp jab I elbow him with, but he keeps coming.
Finally, he lands one square against my temple, hardenough to send stars bursting across my vision. I collapse back onto the cold floor, dazed, my chest heaving.
Lev slams his knee down into my chest, pinning me to the floor. His breath is ragged, his expression a storm.
“What thefuckis going on with you?” he snaps. His hands fist in the collar of my shirt, jerking me an inch off the floor before slamming me back down again.
For a long moment, I don’t answer.
I can’t, I’m too fucking dizzy. The edges of the room are blurring in and out like a warped photograph. My hands flex uselessly at my sides. The only sound in the room is our breathing, his sharp and furious pulls of air and my ragged and wheezing gasps.
