“Couldn’t one of the boys do that?” I asked, keeping my eyes fixed on him and not letting myself look to my side to see Thomas’ empty office.
It had been a week since his accident and after Sean had searched in every way possible for any sign that he was alive, I had to admit that Thomas was gone and I hated it.
“They could, but I’m in charge now and I owe it to him, you know, to keep her safe.”
Sean looked exhausted as he pushed his fingers through his grey hair.
“You okay?”
He wrinkled his nose. “Not in the fucking slightest. I miss him so much.”
“Me too. I hate being up here without him.” Red hadn’t been back in, so I’d been up here alone since I came back to work.
“You don’t have to be up here. You wanna move to the basement? If anyone comes in, you can go up to reception to meet them.”
Tears pricked my eyes as I said what I’d been thinking. “I think I need to leave. Quit. It’s too hard.”
Sean walked around my desk and squatted down in front of me. “You, Helen Fischer, are not going anywhere but the basement with the rest of us. Thomas would haunt you for leaving me to run this place alone.”
“You’re calling me by my actual name, so you must be serious.”
“Helly,”—he took my hands in his—“I need you. I can’t do this without him and then lose you. I’m barely holding it together, although if you repeat that, I’ll have to kill you.”
I let out a soft chuckle. “Okay, but I’m moving downstairs or you need to move up here. It’s like a ghost town. It’s awful.”
He scoffed. “I’m not moving up here. Place is far too polished and posh for me. Get your shit and go downstairs. Get one of the boys to help you and I’ll let reception know where to find you if they need you.” Sean stood, rolling his shoulders. “Thanks, Helly. For being here. For keeping it together for us all.”
“Go take care of Melissa. Let me know how she is.”
And with that, he left me alone with the ghosts.
“Hey, you look tired.” I offered Jax a sad smile as he surprised me by pushing into the booth next to me rather than sitting across from me.
“Long day and you know I hate swapping from night shifts after being on days. My body clock is buggered.”
“We can forget breakfast, so you can go home and sleep if you want.”
He pressed his hand to my thigh. “No, I just need your smile, and I’ll be fine.”
I smiled wider, shaking my head. “Your smooth talking is going to be a problem. I can tell.”
Jax winked and leaned in. “And my dirty talking is going to have you screaming my name as soon as I get a moment alone with you, but in about thirty seconds, we’re going to have company.”
“What?” I looked up just as the door to the diner opened and the rest of Jax’s crew walked in.
“They wanted to check on you… after Thomas.”
After a lot of hugs and kind words, I took my seat again as Jimmy, Tiny, and Henri, who went to school with Conner, took a seat across from me.
“You doing okay, Helen?” Jimmy asked after he’d placed his order with the waitress, who looked like she might faint at the number of firefighters, all still in their blue uniforms, sitting in the booths around us.
“I’ve been better, but thanks for asking.”
“I hope Jax is helping.”
I turned to look at Jax, who I knew was sitting way too close for anyone to think he was just my lodger, watching as his tired eyes warmed as we stared at each other. “He’s doing a pretty good job,” I replied, entwining my fingers with his under the table. “Although he’s constantly nagging me for leaving candles lit around the house.”
“Damn right. Do you know how many fires we—”
