“My good girl.” Her body shuddered violently, showing me how much she liked those words.
She begged for more and I wrapped her hair in my fist, pulling her upright so I could devour her neck as I pressed my fingers to her clit.
It only took a couple of minutes of our bodies slapping together in a sweaty, sexy mass of limbs before she exploded, her pleasure flooding my cock so intensely that I lost control and came as well, my head falling between her shoulder blades, her name on my lips.
Our movements slowed as we teased out the last of our pleasure, both of us breathless. It was then it hit me.
No condom.
Panic surged through me, making me feel physically sick. I couldn’t believe I’d been so stupid.
“Hey, I just need to take this off. I’ll be two seconds.” I eased out of Helen, hoping she didn’t notice as I pulled up my jeans and underwear. She turned and looked up at me, heavy-lidded, a wide smile on her face. My panic stole the beauty from the moment and I hated myself even more.
“How about I follow you up and we can get into bed because I think there is a high possibility of me needing to pass out for an hour to recover from that? It was perfect, Jax.”
I kissed her quickly, guilt about lying to her eating me alive. “I’ll be there in a minute.”
I ran up the stairs, taking them two at a time until I got to the bathroom. Looking at myself in the mirror, bile burned my throat because I’d let myself get carried away and nearly exposed the truth and I wasn’t sure I could stomach the thought of Helen knowing. Then the voice in my head came back to haunt me…
“No one will want you now. They’ll see what a pathetic excuse for a man you are. Your sin is branded into you for the rest of your life.”
Helen
I pulled down my skirt and readjusted my bra, giggling that Jax had ripped my shirt open. It was single-handedly the sexiest thing ever, and it had me grinning like a Cheshire cat as I climbed the stairs on wobbly legs, my thighs slick with arousal.
Jax was right. I could feel him as I walked, my insides aching like they’d taken a battering, and I sucked in a breath as my sensitive clit rubbed against the lace of my panties.
It had been perfect; I’d never felt so wanted. I mean, I was so caught up in the moment that I didn’t even notice him putting on a condom. At least one of us had some sense to think about protection.
I stripped out of my clothes, leaving my underwear on, and then I climbed into bed. Moments later, Jax returned and I let out a sad sigh to see him wearing joggers.
“Do you know, I’ve never seen you naked?” I pulled back the sheets, and he climbed in next to me.
“Yes, you have,” he scoffed, shaking his head.
“I’ve never seen you standing in front of me with nothing on. You always have your underwear or bottoms on.”
He wrapped his arms around me, pressing a kiss to the top of my head. “I will make more effort to be naked in front of you, beautiful. Now tell me, how was your first fucking?”
I leaned up so I could look at him, and while he smiled, something seemed off and he didn’t look completely like his usual happy self.
“It was perfect. Be warned. I don’t think I ever want missionary sex again or sex in bed… the way you pulled my hair, how deep you were, calling me your good girl.” I sighed contentedly as I remembered how hard I’d come. “I’m not sure I should like any of it as much as I did.”
“You are allowed to like all of it and want more.”
“I want more.” Unable to keep away from him, I wrapped my hand around the back of his neck and pulled his mouth to mine. Kissing him slowly, my tongue slid against his as we got lost in the moment. “I want to touch you, Jax. I want to make you come.”
Jax pulled back, letting out a sigh as his fingers pushed my hair from my face. “I think it’s time we chatted.”
I frowned, panicking. “Have I done something wrong?”
“Shit, no, beautiful. You are perfect. It’s me.” He rolled on his side and I mirrored him, so we lay facing each other. “Some stuff happened when I was younger, and well, I don’t really like being touched.”
My mouth fell open as his words settled. “Someone touched you?”
Jax squeezed his eyes shut, shaking his head. “No. Sorry, no. Nothing like that, but what did happen had a lasting effect. And I don’t like being touched. I’ve never come that way…”
My jaw dropped. “Never?”
