I heard every word she said, but there was only one sentence that mattered.
“You think you could fall for me?”
“Jax!”
“You said it. Do you think you could fall for me? Could you see a future with me?”
She didn’t hesitate before she shook her head and I dropped my hand from her cheek as my heart plummeted, ripping painfully through any hope of us being together.
Helen pressed her fingers to her lips as if she was trying to force down her emotions, and then she drove us home, neither of us saying a word.
Chapter 22
Helen
Emotion burned my throat as I tried to stop the tears from falling. His words were everything I wanted to hear, but I couldn’t believe any of them. They were lies. They had to be. I’d never felt really wanted by a man… and now someone like Jax was declaring something that I couldn’t actually believe.
My hands tightened around the steering wheel as I remembered all the times he’d called me beautiful or traced the curves of my hips or told me how perfect I was. It wasn’t just once or even twice; it was constantly. He never made me feel bad about myself or that I should hide my body from him. I mean, he went to all the trouble of buying me underwear and a dress and those shoes that now sat, pride of place, on the side in my bedroom, as they were too beautiful to hide away.
“I’m going to head to the gym and get out of your hair,” Jax muttered before vanishing into the house before I could even step out of the car.
“Jax, please.”
He was already inside and I reached out to take his hand, but he spun quickly. “Your boys are inside.”
“What?”
“Ma? Get in here. We need to talk to you!” Conner yelled.
This was the last thing I wanted. I wanted to hear what Jax had been trying to tell me in the car before my fear got in the way; before I hurt him.
“Please don’t go.” I wrapped my fingers in his and he looked down at our joined hands, offering me the slightest nod.
“Ma,” Conner yelled, louder this time. Jax let go of me and I blew out a breath before walking ahead of him into the living room.
“Jax, great timing, man. Come, sit while we try to talk some sense into Ma.”
I walked in to find Callum leaning against the fireplace, staring down at his phone, while Jasper perched on the arm of the sofa and Conner sat on the floor at his feet. I looked between the three of them, noticing how Cal and Jas didn’t really meet my eyes, offering me an apologetic smile, while Conner was focused on his laptop that was open on the coffee table.
“Boys, why are you in my house?”
“Take a seat, Ma. We’ve been chatting and we’ve decided we needed to talk to you before you get yourself into trouble.”
I fixed my jaw as I took a seat, knowing I wasn’t going to like what was coming.
“Jasper’s moving away, which means, I become the oldest of us boys left here to look after you in your old age and I can’t let you go on the way you’re going without giving you some life lessons.”
I almost laughed because of all my kids, Conner was the least equipped to give me life lessons; the boy had no clue, but his huge heart usually made up for it.
“So what are we looking at?” Jax asked, leaning on the back of the sofa, his hands so close that I could feel the heat from his fingertips dancing across my skin.
“A PowerPoint presentation. I know Mum loves them,” Conner explained.
“Conner made one when he was trying to persuade me and his dad to get a puppy. It didn’t work.”
“But we got a rabbit, so it kind of worked,” he added matter-of-factly.
“I told you this was a bad idea, Conner.” Jasper leaned his head back and stared at the ceiling.
