I collapsed back onto the couch. “Harper found out about that stupid bet.”
Liam’s jaw went slack with shock. “How the fuck did she find out?”
“I don’t know. She didn’t say how, and really the how doesn’t matter. She found out and now she thinks our whole relationship was a lie.”
“Fuck.” Liam settled into the chair across from me, Rory finally quiet in his arms.
“I know,” I groaned, scrubbing my hands through my hair. How the hell had everything gone to shit so quickly?
“I told her the truth about it when she asked. About how it started, how I found out, how I shut it down.” I met his eyes. “But she asked when I knew about it, and I had to tell her I’d known the whole time we were together.”
“Shit.”
“She trusted me completely,” I said. “She told me things she’d never told anyone. And I was keeping this huge secret from her every day.”
“You’d thought you’d killed it. Why would you tell her when it didn’t make a difference?”
That’s how I’d justified it to myself too, but now I could see it from her perspective and it didn’t look good.
“It makes a difference to her. She doesn’t believe what we have is real.”
“Anyone who’s seen you two together can see it’s as real as it gets.”
“But how can I prove it now? Everything I say just sounds like more bullshit. She doesn’t feel like she can trust that I’ve changed at all.”
Liam didn’t say anything for a minute. Rory had fallen asleep against his shoulder, her little hand grabbing his T-shirt. She looked peaceful now. Nothing like the scared, confused baby who’d been crying for Harper.
“Drew.” Liam’s voice was firm. “Look at me.”
I did.
“The old Drew wouldn’t be sitting here freaking out about losing her. The old Drew wouldn’t have cared enough to feel guilty about keeping a secret. The old Drew would have just moved on to the next girl.”
I wanted to believe him. But all I could think about was Harper’s face and the fact that she thought everything we’d built together was fake.
“What do I do?”
“You give her space to feel what she needs to feel,” Liam said. “You don’t chase her, you don’t blow up her phone, you don’t show up wherever she is. You prove you’ve changed by handling this like an adult.”
The advice made sense. It was probably exactly what Harper needed from me.
But it didn’tfeelright.
I wanted to chase her, to make sure she couldn’t forget about the way I made her feel. Except right now, I had to face facts that I made her feel betrayed, and that was like a puck to the gut.
So, I would follow Liam’s advice and give her space.
Even if it was going to kill me.
“What if she doesn’t come back?” I voiced my greatest fear.
Liam’s expression softened. “Then you’ll deal with that too. But Drew, she loves you. I’ve seen the way she looks at you. Love like that doesn’t just disappear because of one mistake.”
“One huge mistake that makes her think our whole relationship was fake.”
“One mistake that you’re owning up to instead of making bullshit excuses. That has to mean something.”
Ireallywanted to believe him.
