“Are you... a bottom?” He asked and then blushed so hard I could see it spread down his neck and across his chest.
God, he was adorable.
“I’m vers,” I said, settling on the edge of the bed. “But since this is your first time, I thought it would be more comfortable for you to fuck me.” I tilted my head, studying him. “Unless you...?”
“Uhm, not tonight.” He swallowed hard, his Adam’s apple bobbing. “I am curious though.”
I filed that away for later. “Have you ever had anal... with your ex?”
His blush deepened impossibly. “No.”
“Never? Not even a little—”
“Nothing.” He couldn’t look at me. “Mackenzie wasn’t... we didn’t... it wasn’t like that.”
Ten years with one woman. Vanilla sex only, apparently. And here he was, in bed with me, about to do something he’d never done before.
The level of trust he had in me made me fucking melt. I reached out and took his hand, threading my fingers through his.
“I’ll teach you,” I said. No teasing. He needed steadiness right now, not my sharp edges.
I tugged him toward me, and he came willingly, letting me pull him close until our foreheads were almost touching.
“But first,” I murmured against his jaw, “you need to fucking relax. It’s not rocket science. I promise, with how bad I want you, it won’t take much to get me off.”
He groaned and I felt some of the tension start to leave his shoulders. “You can’t just say things like that.”
“Why not? It’s true.” I nipped at his earlobe, felt him shiver. “I’ve been thinking about it for ages. You pressing me into the mattress. Your hands pinning my wrists. The way you’d sound when you finally pushed inside me—that little intake of breath you do when something feels good.” I rocked my hips up against him. “I want to hear it. I want to be the reason for it.”
“Théo—”
“I want to hear you fall apart,” I breathed against his ear. “I want to be the one who makes you lose control.”
He snapped.
His hands grabbed my face and he kissed me—deep and desperate, all that careful restraint finally crumbling. I partedmy lips and he slipped his tongue inside, hungry and searching. When I suckled gently on it, he groaned into my mouth, the sound vibrating through my entire body.
We kissed until I lost track of time. His hands roamed my back, my shoulders, the curve of my spine. Mine found his chest, his hips, the hard length of him pressing against my thigh. The frantic energy from before softened into something slower, more deliberate. I felt the nervousness bleeding out of him, replaced by something steadier. Surer.
He started grinding against me, his movements instinctive now, chasing friction. I rolled my hips to meet him and we both groaned.
“Okay,” I murmured against his mouth. “I think you’re ready.”
“I still don’t know what I’m doing,” he admitted.
“I know.” I kissed the corner of his mouth, then his jaw, nipping the stubbled edge. “That’s what makes it hot.”
I pressed the lube and a condom into his hand and lay back against the pillows, spreading my legs in invitation. His eyes tracked down my body, dark and hungry, and I felt myself flush under the attention.
“You’re going to need to prep me first,” I said, keeping my voice steady even though my heart was racing. “Fingers. Start with one.”
He nodded, his jaw set with determination. Like this was a play he needed to learn, a skill he was going to master. It was so very Derek that I almost smiled.
He slicked up his fingers—too much lube but that was better than too little—and settled between my thighs. His big hand stroked my hip, soothing.
“Tell me if I hurt you,” he said.
“You won’t.”
