“You can take it out after I leave.”
I still didn’t want him to go. Not yet. Not when I’d finally gotten a taste of this after so long craving it. I wanted to seehim, to show him my appreciation, to pleasure him in return. I nodded anyway.
“Five minutes. Count them. Don’t take the blindfold off or move from this spot until the time is up. I’ll know if you do. Understand?”
“Yes, Sir.”
“Good boy. Maybe next time, I’ll let you touch me back.” Then his hand withdrew. “Five minutes, Benny Bear. Three hundred seconds. Count them.”
“Three hundred…” I sighed. “Two hundred and ninety-nine… two hundred and ninety-eight…” I tried to listen for him, tried to find where he was. “Two hundred and ninety-seven… two hundred and ninety-six… two hundred and ninety-five…”
The plug continued buzzing.
“Two hundred and eighty-eight… two hundred and eighty-seven…”
The door clicked.
“Two hundred and eighty-six.”
I knew he was gone. I knew he wasn’t sticking around to make sure I counted all the way down to zero. I continued counting anyway. I didn’t move from my spot on the rug. I didn’t take the blindfold off or the plug out. Because he’d told me not to. Because I was a good boy. Because I’d do whatever he wanted.
I had no idea who he was. But I already needed more of him.
one
Harper – Age 16
LOST AND FOUND.
Wet skin bathed in warm light. Sun-kissed, perfect muscles that rippled as he laughed. He was beautiful, the only thing I could tolerate about this place now that Logan was gone.
I shouldn’t be here. I shouldn’t be looking.
Jarred Harrington could never be mine. No man ever could be, unless I wanted to follow in my brother’s footsteps and leave the family.
This was my first year visiting Silverpines Lake without him. Logan left us just one month ago, in such a rush to cut ties with our family he didn’t take anything with him, not even Celestine, his beloved Burmese python. He just abandoned us to go live with some rich boyfriend he’d never told me about. He didn’t even say goodbye. Just told Dad he was leaving and that we shouldn’t contact him anymore.
I’d thought maybe he would have come back by now. Logan always was kind of impulsive. Maybe he just left after another fight with Dad, and he’d be back soon, and we’d just pretend none of it happened like we always did. I was still waiting.
Coming on our annual trip without him felt wrong. My stomach twisted constantly in discomfort, because now it was starting to feel real. What if he really wasn’t coming back?
Laughter resonated from the edge of the water. Jarred had such a loud, beautiful laugh. I’d never told anyone how I felt about him, not even Logan. If I didn’t speak it out loud, then maybe it would be okay to have this. As long as I never did anything about it, no one would ever have to know.
He laughed as he threw Sophie into the lake. She kicked and screamed until she hit the surface, and the others with them laughed too. I wasn’t like them. Did Jarred feel interested in her the same way I was interested in him?
“What ya looking at, Harpy?” A loud and unwelcome voice made me jump. I turned to see Tristan Moore’s obnoxious grin.
“Nothing,” I answered shortly. “And don’t call me that.”
“Logan calls you that.”
“You aren’t Logan.”
Tristan smiled. He was always smiling, as if everything was so damn amusing to him. Like it was all one big game. Well, I wasn’t playing. I shouldered past him, a little harder than necessary, though with our dramatic height difference I doubted it had the effect I wanted it to.
“Speaking of Logan, have you heard from him?”
I paused, turning to face him again. “No. Haven’t you?”
