"Exactly. I don't want to be little all the time. But I want the option. The safety to let go when I'm overwhelmed or scared or just need to not be in charge for a while."
"That's very self-aware."
"The girls in book club helped. Hearing them talk about their relationships, seeing how it works for them. It made me realize what I need."
"And what do you need from a Daddy? If you were going to describe your ideal dynamic."
I consider the question. "Someone patient. Who doesn't rush me but also doesn't let me hide. Someone who gives me structure when I need it but knows when to step back. Someone who..." I trail off, embarrassed.
"Someone who what?"
"Someone who doesn't make me feel broken for needing this. Who actually wants to take care of me. Not because I'm incapable, but because it brings them joy."
"That's exactly what a good Daddy does." He leans forward. "And for the record, taking care of you would absolutely bring me joy."
My heart races. "Yeah?"
"Yeah. You know what I see when I look at you?"
"What?"
"Someone who gives and gives and gives to everyone around her. Who makes sure every customer feels special, who takes in stray kittens, who checks on her friends constantly. But who doesn't always take care of herself the same way."
He's not wrong.
"You need someone to make sure you're eating real meals, not just taste-testing pastries all day. Someone to remind you to close the shop on time instead of working yourself to exhaustion. Someone to tell you that it's okay to rest, to play, to just be."
Tears prick my eyes again. "How do you know all that?"
"Because I've been watching you for eight months. I've seen you give yourself away in pieces to everyone who walks through that door. And I've wanted to be the person who makes sure you get something back."
"Tyler—"
"I'm not saying I'm perfect for you. I'm not saying I know exactly what you need. But I'm saying I want to try. If you'll let me."
I look at this man across the table. This strong, patient, observant man who somehow sees straight through to my heart.
"I want to try too," I whisper.
His smile could light up the whole restaurant. "Yeah?"
"Yeah. But I need to tell you something first."
"Okay."
"I've never done this before. The dynamic, I mean. I've read about it. Fantasized about it. But I've never actually explored it with anyone."
"That's okay. I have and every couple’s dynamic is different, unique to them. We'll figure ours out together."
"What if I'm bad at it?"
"There's no bad at it. There's just learning what works for us." He reaches across the table again, taking my hand. "But we will need to establish some things first. Ground rules. Boundaries. Safe words."
"Safe words?"
"A way for you to tell me if something doesn't feel right. Red means stop immediately. Yellow means slow down, we need to talk. Green means keep going. These are the most basic of all and I’m sure you’ve heard of them. It probably sounds stupid to bring it up, but I need to know you'll use them. That you'll tell me when something's too much or not enough."
"I will. I promise."
