“Do you—” I pause, forgetting whatever I was just about to ask her when I spot Nathan in the living room. My heart falls to the pit of my stomach and I feel like I can’t breathe when I take in the girl sitting on his lap. His hand rests on her inner thigh with the tip of his thumb hidden beneath the hem of her skirt.
“Chlo.”
I hear Savannah say my name, but I can’t look away. Nathan dips his head, whispering something in the girl's ear, causing her to tip her head forward with a laugh.
I stand rooted to the spot, wondering if this is some sort of payment. My karma for even attempting to stand up for myself for once. I didn’t come when he called last week and this is my punishment.
I had typed out ‘on my way,’ but before I could hit send, there was a blunt, little too honest voice in my head sayinghe’s using you. It was like wet hair in the center of your back when you get out of the shower, impossibly annoying, but unable to shake. I deleted the message, hellbent on proving what Maverick said wasn’t true. Not for him, but for me. I wanted to prove to myself that what we have didn’t revolve around what Nathan could get from me. But the following day, by the third unanswered text, I knew I begrudgingly got the confirmation I needed. I knew that just like last semester when I declared I was done with him, I would have to start the process of forgetting him all over again. But seeing him now, with one hand at the back of this stranger's neck and the other between her thighs, still makes my chest physically ache.
Nathan whispers something again, only this time, instead of a coy laugh, she angles her face, guided by his hand now atthe back of her head, and they kiss. It’s slow, and hungry, and everything he’s never done with me.
“Ugh.” Savannah’s scoff is enough to make me look away, but not enough to stop the stinging in my chest. “I think I’m more grateful every day that you finally cut that dirtbag.”
I smile, weakly. “Same.”
Over Savannah’s shoulder, Nathan and his make-out buddy have yet to come up for air. My stomach drops again, because even though I was prepared to avoid him, there was a tiny, stubborn part of me that had hoped I’d run into him tonight. What I wasn’t prepared for was seeing him like this.
I turn, facing Savannah who is searching through the crowd. “Don’t be mad, but I think I’m going to get going.”
“Chlo,” she says, eyes pleading. “Because of him?”
“No,” I lie. “No, I’ve been battling a headache all night and it’s just not getting better in here.” I look up and around, anywhere but at her face where she’ll read the truth in my eyes.
“Alright, let me go pee, and we’ll get going.”
“No,” I blurt out and then try again when I see the worry on her face. “Isn’t Noah on his way?”
“Yeah?” She shrugs. “I’ll just text him and tell him I had to leave early.”
“Please don’t. I’m just going to go home and lie down in my dark room. I’ll be more upset if I know you’re on the other side of the wall wide awake, giving up your Friday night.”
For a moment, she just watches me with a pinched expression. I rub my temples for good measure, forcing another smile.
“Are you sure?”
“I’m positive.”
“Okay,” she hesitates.
I smile, pulling her in for a hug. “Love you.”
“You too.” She rubs my shoulder when I pull back, and Idon’t spare a second glance to the couch before running out the front door.
The lawn is littered with stragglers but it’s the group of four hockey players walking up the driveway that has me looking for another path out. A row of bushes scratches across my back as I try to duck and slide behind a couple.
“Hey! Coop!”
I squeeze my eyes shut and briefly think about bolting, but I woman up, turn around, and offer a wave, hoping that will suffice.
The couple that failed to hide me, walk away, and Noah, Silas, and two other guys from their team close the distance from the driveway in two steps. “Where’s Savvy?” Noah asks, looking toward the front door.
“She’s inside.” I throw a thumb over my shoulder.
“You heading out?”
“Yeah, I’ve got a…” My breath stalls in my throat when over Noah’s shoulder, I catch Maverick pocketing his keys and strolling up the sidewalk. To say I’ve been avoiding him would be a dramatic understatement. I don’t know if I’m more embarrassed for saying the things I said, or because he was right all along. Either way, I didn’t expect to be confronted with it tonight.
“Chlo,” he greets me with that confident smirk, his tongue flicking out as he snaps his gum between his teeth.
