“For God’s sake, your love isn’t a business,” Catherine pushed. “What you have is real and very special. And if you’d ever bringa child into this world for something as horrible as a business opportunity, I’ll kick your butt myself.”
She allowed me to laugh although the ache continued.
“No, I would not do that. However, you and I both know men within this type of organization measure certain success by how many children they have.”
“Then they aren’t worth wasting your time on. But Donatello isn’t like that. Don’t you see?” Catherine moved closer, finally sitting down. “Don’t you know how he lights up when you enter a room? Don’t you have any idea how many times he’d mentioned you over the years? Ever since I’ve been with the family, I could easily tell how much he adores you. You are the light of his life. The light to his darkness. He wants you, not children.”
“Really?” Seeing the look in her eyes convinced me she was telling the truth.
“Absolutely. And the way you two are together is priceless.”
Wasn’t that something I’d said before?
“I was told I couldn’t have children as well and you see what happened.” Nona squeezed my hand. “You need to follow your heart, Emmeline. Not that big brain of yours. And you need to place your trust in yourself and in your husband.”
“What if he dies?”
When I blurted out the question, the two women looked at each other, Nona patting my hand.
“I asked the same question,” Catherine said, sighing. “Alexander heading off to work was nothing like a normal guy. Right? Did I know if he’d be leaving the house with guns blazing, killing tenpeople before nine in the morning, outrunning two car chases with people trying to kill him by lunch and by dinner? God only knew. Only those things didn’t happen. While often he put on a suit and went to the office, sometimes coming home late, I was usually the one who was the last one in the house.”
“What about danger?” Now I was whining, which didn’t look good on me.
“You must have heard someone tell you that you could be walking across the street and get hit by a car. Trust me, the fear will ebb and flow. When I know he’s in a dangerous situation, I worry. Because I love him, but if I go around all day long full of anxiety then I’m not living. If anything, this life provides me with the will to live everything to the fullest. And we do. We love big. We live large. But we’re careful. We rely on each other.”
“You have a magical relationship,” I told her.
“So do you. You lived a fantasy for years since you met him. Right? You envisioned what it would be like to be with him.”
I’d be damned if my face didn’t feel extreme heat. “Maybe. Don’t tell anyone, especially Donatello. He will never allow me to live it down.”
I studied Catherine, so jealous of the love she shared with Alexander.
“You’re a queen,” Nona told me, drawing my attention.
“You said a princess.”
When she pulled out a little sachet bag from her purse, I shook my head. “You’re a queen of the spirits. You don’t trust yourself well enough to believe in your abilities.”
I thought about the little gris-gris from when I was in Brazil, frowning when I did. “What is this for?”
“To help your belief in yourself, your marriage, and your little family. You already have all the answers you’re seeking. You simply need to believe in yourself. Oh, and maybe invoke a little spell or two of your own.” She folded my hand over the gris-gris and I took a deep whiff. Night-blooming jasmine. I wasn’t entirely certain what the inclusion of the fragrance meant, but I instantly felt awash with comfort and a little peace.
As always, my Nona was right.
Gris-gris was powerful.
I enjoyed the wine and the conversation, leaving almost an hour later.
When I got to my car, Donatello appeared out of nowhere. The other men had already left, leaving just the two of us outside the house.
“You didn’t need to wait for me,” I told him. I was becoming more agitated with myself at not being able to let go of my fears.
“I wasn’t waiting,” he said too quickly, laughing afterward. “Maybe I was. I wanted to give you this.”
I don’t know what I was expecting, but when he pulled out a folded piece of paper, for some stupid reason my heart sank. “What is this?” I asked the question as if I couldn’t open the note.
He shrugged. “Francoise sent this, along with some other things, but he wanted us to have it.”
