I don’t know that I’d survive it.
Gage is silent for a few seconds before he turns to fully face me. “The only reason I’m sitting on this blanket with you right now, Bishop, is because I want to be. Because I can’t seem to stop myself from wanting to be wherever you are.”
The sincerity in his words makes my chest tighten violently around my lungs, making it hard to breathe.
People don’t talk like that.
Men don’t say things like that to women like me.
I’ve always been the Tomboy, the one kicking asses instead of kissing them. I’ve never cared what anyone thought about me or what I was doing with my life. I’ve ignored the dirty looks from other women, the jibes tossed at me from men who were just insecure because I was stronger than them.
I’ll forever be thought of as a renegade for not following the path I should have, and I’ve embraced that. This is who I am and always wanted to be.
Yet, what Gage observed so easily is true. Since I became an adult, no one else has ever really taken care of me because I haven’t let them.
I’ve taken care of myself.
Any sexual connections I had couldn’t even be called relationships because they were always brief—hot, hard, and fast flings designed to satiate my momentary needs.
Never more than one or two nights in any one bed and never in mine.
Never opening up.
Never revealing anything about myself that matters.
Because ultimately, the life I lead isn’t one that leaves room for someone else.
Gage somehow sees that. Yet, he’s still here. Where he claims he wants to be. He sees me and isn’t scared away.
“Can I ask you something?” His voice wavers slightly, and I wait for him to continue. He takes another sip of the wine before he does. “What would’ve happened the other night if you hadn’t been at the club?”
“What do you mean?”
He shrugs. “If you hadn’t been there and that creep had grabbed the girl, what would’ve happened?”
“I guess you would’ve intervened and our doorman probably would’ve put you on your ass, the same way I did, and then kicked you out. Unless he saw the whole thing and knew what you were doing. In that case, he would have thanked you and gotten you a free drink.”
He nods slowly. “So, either way, everything would have been handled.”
“I guess.”
“Meaning they can operate without you there.”
I lock my jaw because I can see exactly where this is going, and it is not a journey I particularly care to take right now.
Gage keeps pressing. “You’re not supposed to be working right now, are you?”
“No.”
“But I caught you walking into the club.”
“Yeah…”
“On your night off.”
With a huff, I throw up my hands. “What’s your point?”
He offers a little mirthless laugh. “My point is that you have to have something in your life outside of your job. I know they’re your family and you care about them, but you hire people to do certain tasks. You delegate. You trust them to do it. And if you don’t, you’re going to burn yourself out or drive yourself mad trying to handle it all on your own.”
