Lilah nods. “Same. I’m ready for them to be home. Ten days is too long.”
Even though things are a little rocky with Callum right now, I’m ready too. I forgot how much I missed him when he was on the road. Even when things don’t feel right between us, I still want him there.
We bid each other good night, and I climb into the car with Vanessa, who is giving me a ride home since we’re going to the same building.
“So,” she starts once we’re halfway there, “how are things going with Keller? Are you settling in okay?”
“Seattle has been great. And you ladies have really welcomed me into your group, which I appreciate.”
She twists her lips, then slides her eyes my way before looking back at the road. “And with Keller?”
Shit. I was hoping she wouldn’t catch on to the fact that I didn’t answer that part of the question.
“Uh, they’re good.”
“Yes, because you soundsosure about that,” she deadpans.
She’s right. I didn’t sound sincere at all, and that’s mostly because I’m not. Things aren’t okay, but I don’t know why, which makes it hard to explain. How familiar does that sound? I had no idea three years ago what was making me so unhappy, but once I had space, I could pick out what it was—me.
Now, I feel like I’m right back at square one, and I don’twantspace this time. I want to stay. I want to work it out with my husband. That starts with being honest—with myself and Callum. I need to tell him about the second interview and the conversation I had with Avery at the wedding. Unlike with London, I want him to be involved in the decision-making process this time. He’s my husband, and he has a right to know.
“You don’t have to tell me,” Vanessa says when we pull into the garage. “But just so you know, I’m here if you need an ear. We’reallhere. I might be new to the group, but we’ve all been through some rough times, some more than others, so there won’t be any judgment if that’s what you’re worried about. Or if you’re still trying to figure it all out yourself, that’s okay too. But you’re not alone. Just remember that.”
I tell her I appreciate it and will let her know if I want to talk, and I’m surprised by how much I mean it. I try not to think about the fact that if I lose Callum for real this time, I’ll lose these new friendships too, or how Ireallydon’t want that to happen.
I wave goodbye to Vanessa as I exit the elevator, and as I push into the apartment, exhaustion takes over. All I want to do is take a long bath and lie down, so that’s exactly what I do. I fill Callum’s big tub—one I highly doubt he’s ever used since he thinks baths are like swimming in your own filth—then climb inside. I don’t get back out until I’m wrinkled like a raisin.
After, I take my time applying lotion and moisturizing all the places that need it. Then I put on the coziest pajamas I can find and head toward the bed. But the second I look at it, I know it’s not what I want right now. I want familiar. I want comfort. I want our old bed.
I pad into the spare room, where Percy is already curled up on my destination. “Hey, little man,” I say to him as I approach. “Mind if I get in there too?”
Meow.
I take his answer as a yes and settle in next to him. He gets up and lies back down against my neck, a place I’ve seen him sleep several times now on Callum. I’m not sure how long I stay there like that, but it’s long enough that I fall asleep, only to be awoken by two strong arms lifting me up.
“Callum?” I ask, trying to blink my eyes open.
“Yep, just me. Not a stranger trying to touch your butt.”
I smile, then snuggle against him, loving how warm he is and how good he smells—like home.
“I miss you,” I say, the words slipping out easily.
He chuckles lightly. “I missed you, too, Clover.” I want to correct him, but I’m too tired to do so. “What are you doing sleeping in there?”
“I don’t know. I just wanted to feel close to you again.”
He doesn’t say anything, but I still get the sense he understands exactly what I mean. He sets me on the bed, then shuffles me around until I’m tucked tightly under the blankets. I protest when he moves away from me, but he promises he’ll be back, and I take him at his word as he shuts the door to the bathroom.
Five minutes later, he returns and slips beneath the blankets beside me. His hand lands on my hip, and his touch is completely innocent, but I don’twantinnocent. I want him. I scoot back, rubbing against him until I feel his cock stir to life and hear his unsteady breaths in my ear.
He squeezes my waist. “Clover…it’s late.”
“Please?” I ask, rolling toward him, suddenlyfranticfor his touch. “Please, Callum. I want to feel you inside me.”
He stares at me—hard—and I worry he’s going to tell me no, or worse, break up with me in this moment. But he doesn’t.
“Fuck it,” he mutters, then he kisses me, and I sigh because everything feels right again.
