I let Rachel dress me for the party because she wouldn’t shut up about it. “You have to be the best dressed at your birthday party,” she told me.
Oh, what the hell, I thought after the fifth plea. It’s also a rebellious pushback against Shannon. If she is going to make me attend my unwanted party, I can wear whatever I want.
If I’m lucky, my neighbor Jack will be here tonight. I spend my days daydreaming about him, but I don’t think he sees me as anything other than a teenager. Why would he? I’m nineteen.
I try to catch him whenever he’s outside, in hopes of getting to know him better, but all it ever leads to is small talk. He’s a golden retriever type, but I can tell there’s another layer to him beneath his niceness. You don’t end up in what I assume is a motorcycle club by being sweet and docile. Still, he always asks me if I’m okay and says that if I ever need anything to let him know.
I never notice women coming and going from his house, despite my FBI-level surveillance out my window, but I’m sure women are lined up to jump his bones. He is powerfully built—the sleeves of his shirt strangle his biceps, and his forearms bulge when he works on his bike. His long dark brown hair looks unkempt, but I know it’s a style, not bedhead. Whenever we talk, he brushes it out of his beautiful green eyes. I would love to run my fingers through his hair sometime. Or stroke my hands down one of the tattoos lining his arms. Or stare into his eyes and learn all his secrets.
I sigh. My rare interaction with him is the single good thing about moving to this godforsaken town.
Coming back to reality, I giggle. “Thank you. My outfit isn’t as bad as I thought. Actually, it’s kinda cute.” I never imagined wearing a short skirt and a shirt that shows my stomach, but here we are, and I don’t hate it.
This isn’t the first party held at our house. Austin has thrown two since we moved in, both when my dad was away on business and Shannon was wherever she goes when Dad leaves town. Dad’s new job has him traveling more lately. A few years ago, he started a private equity firm, but he demands to be directly involved with the initial takeover of every company they acquire, and that means he goes where the business sends him. I’m reallyproud of how far he’s come. I just wish he wasn’t gone all the time. However, more companies acquired means more money to spend, and Shannon can always burn through more cash. She used to go on business trips with Dad, but lately she books girls’ trips, claiming she needs to “destress.” What she needs to destress from, I’ll never know. I’m almost sure she’s cheating on him, but I have no proof, and I’m not sure Dad cares. As long as there is someone to handle talking to the school, dealing with doctor’s appointments, and making sure there is food in the house, he doesn’t question what she does.
We head down, and all the people I’d expect are there—the football team, some other athletes, and all the girls who want them. I wonder if Shannon put out a dress code, because all the girls wear the same boring shit—cropped spirit wear with skin-tight shorts that might actually be boyfriend underwear, and bleached-blonde hair.
All the who’s who of the town are out back, scattered around the pool and in the pool house. They may dress more professionally and drink cocktails from real glasses rather than solo cups, but their motives are the same. They want an escape from their miserable lives, and they desperately want to fit in. It’s sad, really. Is this what I have to look forward to in life? The idea of going off to college, finding someone my dad and Shannon approve of, that will fit right into the many dinner parties and charity events they attend curdles my stomach.
“There you are,” Dad says as I peek my head out the patio door. He’s holding a stack of empty glasses and making for the kitchen behind me. “Wow. You look exactly like your mother.”
A shadow of sadness crosses Dad’s face, and I hate the woman who abandoned us and made Dad settle for second best. “Thanks,” I say flatly.
“I know you hate that, but it’s true. And she was beautiful.”
“Dad, she’s a bitch for leaving.”
He doesn’t respond. “Well, happy birthday. Shannon has planned a beautiful party to celebrate you. Isn’t it great your friends are here too?”
“Dad . . .”
“You can make new friends, Jess.”
I roll my eyes. “I’m not interested.”
He nudges me. “Give it a try.”
Dad goes to the kitchen while I turn around to head to the living room. Music pulses through my body as I scan the people clogging my favorite spot in the house. A few couples sit off to one side, running their hands all over each other. Austin and David huddle with their friends in a corner. A plastic bag passes between them and I glance away. How Austin got involved in drugs, I don’t know. And how he gets away with it is a mystery.
The fact that none of the adults here seem to notice or care about us kids is further evidence of the escape they seek. Austin banned alcohol at this party, per Shannon’s request, but anyone paying the slightest attention can see that most of these kids are buzzed.
Austin and David stroll up to me.
“You decided to have some fun tonight?” David asks.
I yank my skirt down and hug my stomach. This outfit was a mistake. I cringe at David’s perusal of my bare skin. “I guess. It’s my party, after all.”
Austin glares at me. “Rachel. She wants this dick so bad, it’s almost embarrassing. If I can’t find anyone else tonight, I might let her ride it.” I almost gag, but he continues. “It looks like you want some attention too.”
David slaps Austin’s arm. “Don’t be an ass, dude.”
Austin chuckles and squeezes David’s shoulder before walking off.
I stare at my feet, trying to avoid David’s fixed gaze. I’m going to kill Rachel for making me wear this outfit. David isgood-looking, tall, muscular, always clean-shaven, dresses like he walked out of a Ralph Lauren ad (if that’s your type). But he’s an asshole most of the time he speaks, which ruins everything. I’m not into the athletic god mentality either.
David steps in closer. As I retreat, he lightly grabs my hip, where my bare skin shows most. “Austin can be a dick. But you look really pretty tonight.”
My cheeks pink and I step away. “Um, thank you.”
