“You have. You picked my brothers. You picked my father when you told him I snuck out of the castle to go to that party.”
“You were sixteen!”
“You still picked him. You picked Abigail.” Her face crumples in an un-Lyra like expression and I instinctively reach for her to comfort.
But she steps away, schooling her face into her usual coolness. “I’m not some rebound either,” she continues. “If you’re here, you’re over her. If you decide to stay, you better start putting me first, Spencer. I won’t stand for it any other way. And don’t waste too much time, because I’m not waiting for you.”
“There’s the talkIwanted.” With that, she sweeps back into the lobby.
That’s when I see that her jumpsuitisbackless, and the cameras have caught the entire exchange on film.
16
Lyra
I
headstraightfortheback doors of the lobby after my chat with Spencer, desperate for some air to cool the heat of my cheeks. That was—
That was badass. Even I have to admit that.
I did not fall into Spencer’s arms. But I’m not denying that it was tempting.
Earlier, at Camille’s, after I talked to Sophie, I called Kate. She made me understand that while I might be touched that Spencer would travel so far out of his comfort zone to come here, I was allowed to be angry at his timing.
“You can be angry with him, even if you’re happy to see him,” Kate had told me. “You give him a chance if that’s whatyouwant to do, not because you feel obligated.”
“I don’t feel obligated to do anything,” I argued.
Kate sighed. “Lyra, you’re a princess. Your whole life is an obligation. But you’re out of Laandia now, away from the castle. You don’t have to be Princess Lyra there. Try to be Lyra Erickson for a bit.”
“No one wants Lyra Erickson.”
“If they don’t, they don’t deserve you,” she had said heatedly.
I told Spencer that he knew me better than anyone, but was that true? Did he just know Princess Lyra better than most? And what about Lyra Erickson? What did she think about Spencer showing up?
She’s mad at him.
Which is the reason behind my little speech, most of which, I imagine, Spencer was not expecting. I could see it on his face; his expression was that of every man who had ever been attracted to me. The connection is there—the attraction, the chemistry, or whatever it can be called. It’s always been there.
While we’ve both openly denied it, I’ve always known that Spencer and I would be good together. The fact that he’s only realizing this after I made a point of trying to forget him is… For such an intelligent man, Spencer is a dimwitted nitwit whose understanding of the female species can be compared to the Wi fi signal here—weak, spotty, and basically non-existent.
Maybe more than that, but I’m not giving him too much credit at this moment.
Both of us have been idiots, but Spencer more than me.
Today was a good day, and tonight had been even better. Good conversations, a few real connections, and yes, some kissing—Jon (amazingly thorough) and Leo (somewhat lackluster). I’ve laughed and told stories and I was one hundred percent Lyra Erickson, and they still seemed to like me.
I liked me.
And then I saw Spencer and now everything is mixed up.
“Where did you sneak off to?” Ashton says suddenly from beside me. “Jon was about to send off a search party.”
I clutch my chest and try to control my jumping heart rate. “I was just—Spencer.” I grind my teeth. I’m glad it’s Ashton who found me because I need a minute before I rejoin the group.
“You talked to him?” he asks under his breath.
