“Plus, I know the secret to melt the crunchy M&M coating,” Kate adds. “Not everyone will take the time to find the proper way. This is going to be new for you.”
“You make it sound like I don’t know how to make friends,” I pout. “Gracie Abrams is my new bestie. And Millie Bobby Brown follows me on Insta. So there.”
Kate is not impressed. “You’re going to have to be soft. Less Lyra, maybe.”
“If I’m not myself, how will they fall in love with me?”
Kate laughs, long and loud. “You know those guys will fall for you as soon as they step out of the car. That’s not the point here. The point is thatyouwant to fall in love with one ofthem. Right?”
“Right.” I sound convincing, even to myself.
“So you’re going to have to let them in. That’s why you’re going to do the show. Right?”
A pause.
Do I want to fall in love? Yes. Of course. Everyone needs love in their life, even the Party Princess.
I want my own happily ever after, just like my brothers are getting. Only it’s proven to be a little more difficult for me.
I somehow manage to intimidate the good men, or push them away when they get too close. And the ones I should avoid with a ten-foot-pole flock around me like zombies looking for a brain. And honestly, some of them wear me down with their constant litany of compliments and presents of shiny things.
Also, it’s like my heart stopped accepting guests after Mom died.
The Suitor—and Suitorette—shows may be formulaic reality television, full of needless drama and some contestants only there to find their fifteen minutes of fame, but it has worked its magic for some couples. Grayson and Bexley are the perfect example.
There may be more, but I’d have to look them up. I’ve watched a handful of episodes, enough to know what’s in store for me, but I’m not a huge fan.
I think that’s best.
“It’ll be fun. I’ll fall in love,” I say blithely. “I’ll be so soft I’ll be squishy. No need to worry about anything.No onehas to worry about anything.”
I should reiterate that to my brothers. Because as soon as they hear I’m going to be the next Suitorette—and I know Grayson will tell Odin, who will tell the others—they will start to worry about why I’m doing it, how it will it work, and when I’ll make a scene on television.
The why will be the big question.
All four of them have upped communication with me since Spencer got together with Abigail.
Even though they all claim that I drive them crazy, I know they all have a soft spot for their little sister.
If I told them earlier, they would ask the questions and give me the advice like they know what’s best for me. They would think I’m doing this because of Spencer Laz and I’m not.
I’m really not.
And although I refuse to lie to other people, no one said anything about lying to myself.
The truth of the matter is that Spencer is with Abigail. And I need to find someone fast so I can stop feeling like I’ve had an essential part of my body ripped off.
Maybe not essential, like a hand or a foot. More like my elbow is missing and it’s stopping me from doing things like I used to do them.
That’s why I’m going on the show.
To learn to live without my elbow.
3
Spencer
“L
