Mason pushed Chris off, annoyed but not fully angry. He came back with another argument, but I wasn’t paying attention anymore. I was staring at the dark hallway upstairs. I knew my way around the house. I also knew something was up there. I was so compelled to go up the steps it felt like I was being called without hearing my name. I took a step away from them, then another, and another, until I was at the foot of the stairs.
They were still wrapped up in their argument.
“…you know how bad it would be if we left, Chris? Where the hell am I going to take him that they won’t find us? We need to stand up to this. I was with him the whole time. I’m a cop, and that still means something.”
“They’ll just assume you’re involved too. They aren’t going to take your word for it this time, especially after you made sure they knew your connection. The only thing you can do is...”
I took a step up, then another. I was halfway up the winding staircase and they were still arguing when I heard it. It sounded like a whisper on a nonexistent breeze. It was like the disembodied voice in my dreams. “Elijah.”
I kept moving upward, and started down the hallway at the top of the stairs. As I left the landing, I heard Mason call out, “Hey! Elijah! Where are you going?”
I didn’t stop, compelled by something beyond my control. I knew where Brock’s bedroom was, and though I wasn’t consciously heading there, I came to a stop in front of it. The door was closed. There was police tape on the floor.Why were we here?Why had it been the place Chris wanted to talk to us? Was he hoping I’d see something? Was he testing my abilities, the ones I kept telling him I didn’t know how to control? I opened the door despite the police tape, reached inside, and turned on the light.
Blood. There were bloodstains everywhere. They’d darkened with time, dried into a rust color, but there was no mistaking them. They were on the bed, a trail on the floor. He’d tried to get to the bathroom, to hide maybe, to lock himself in and call the police, mend his wounds enough to survive until help arrived. My heart dropped at the scene. He’d tried to survive, to live, but they hadn’t let him. And it was all because of me.Me.I didn’t know how or why, but it was my fault.
“Elijah.” It wasn’t really a voice. No one else could have heard it, but it was coming from the bathroom, where the trail of blood led. Ignoring the fact that I was a suspect traipsing around a crime scene, I made my way through the room toward the bathroom door. I heard footsteps on the stairs that I optimisticallyassumed were Mason and Chris. I ignored them.
The bathroom light didn’t work. I flicked it a few times but the room remained dark, the only light coming from the window at the other end. I was drunk enough to not freak out when the faint light allowed me to focus on the shadow near the window that was darker than the others.“He can’t save you.”
I was annoyed. “I know. You tell me all the time. Nothing can. I hear it when I’m awake, when I’m asleep. When I’m at work or at murder scenes. I don’t know who you are or what you want, but you’re repeating yourself and it’s unhelpful as fuck.”
“Run for the place you love. She was sent for the time. Your sacrifice won’t be in vain. The breath of life can be taken, but new life can bloom.”
“Man, what the fuck?” I was about to go the helloff.I’d had enough bullshit lately, and the non-answers were making it worse.
Suddenly, the bathroom light flicked on, even though it wouldn’t come on for me, and Mason was there. “What are you doing in here?” His voice was gentle and concerned, and I turned, suddenly registering the blood all over the room. I was standing on a bloodstained rug. There were handprints on the counter where Brock had tried to catch himself before he fell right where I was standing and never got back up. My eyes paused on the chalk outline.
I could feel the tears on my face but wasn’t aware of them falling. It hurt. It hurt that he’d suffered in pain and fear when his only mistake had been fucking me. The words I’d just heard from the shadow were playing in my brain but not making any sense. That was some serious cinematic mothman rambling. The shadow was gone, and I had no idea what had been speaking to me. I knew it wasn’t Brock, and it wasn’t the guy who’d been on my porch swing. All I really took from the conversation was that I’d be a sacrifice. At least I wouldn’t die in vain.
I finally looked at Mason, hoping it would be him I saved, hoping it was his life that would bloom. He was so hell-bent on saving me. Now that we were together, and he knew he wasforgiven, maybe he’d be able to truly move forward. It hurt that he would move on without me, but the thought that I might cause his death made my heart turn to ice. It was too late to make him leave. Everyone knew we were together, and he was on the list. I’d been too fucking happy to try to stop it, pretending I could have a life with him. Pretending he’d stay if I lived. Pretending I had time.
“Hey.” Mason reached out and gently took my arm, pulling me away from the bloody scene in the bathroom. “Come here.” He turned me around in his arms and pulled me into a tight hug. “You shouldn’t be up here,” he whispered, kissing the top of my head. “You didn’t need to see this.”
I wanted to ask him why we were here, but I let him pull me out of the room and through the bedroom, trying to shield my eyes from what I’d already seen. Chris was waiting in the hall, looking at the floor. “Sorry, Elijah. I didn’t mean for you to see that.”
“Did they get him in his fucking sleep?” I was still slurring, but I didn’t care.
“We think he was awake when they came in. The TV and lights were on, but he was in bed. The windows in the breakfast nook weren’t alarmed. I’m not sure why, but they were kind of high up and there were thorn bushes under them. There were cameras on them, so maybe it saved some money and he thought it wasn’t necessary. They hacked the cameras, though. There’s nothing but an uneventful loop there. They broke a window to get in, but we didn’t find any fingerprints. Everything was clean. Which makes it seem a little odd for the murderer to drop a fucking bracelet. A point I’ve made repeatedly.”
“I wasn’t here, but itismy fault,” I said softly. The alcohol was dulling my filter.
“No, it isn’t,” Mason said softly, rubbing my hair.
His words broke my filter completely. I pulled back. “It is! It’s obviously something I did! I don’t know what I did or who I pissed off, but it’s my fault. All of them. If I hadn’t fucked them, they’d still be alive. It’s like I cursed them all. And now you,Mason! You’re cursed too!” I was fucking sobbing and couldn’t stop, even though Chris was staring at me wide-eyed and poised like he’d just pulled over a teen girl who started bawling out of fear and he didn’t know what to do.
Mason tried to say something, but I cut him off. “Do you think you aren’t on the list now?” I wailed. “I know you are. If you weren’t already, we just went out and let the whole damn town know we’re together. I... can’t. I can’t be responsible for your death. I’ll die. I’ll die, Mason. I waited so long. My whole life I thought there was no chance, but now I have it and it’s about to be ripped away. Don’t you see? I want to die instead. I don’t want them to hurt you. I wish they’d just come for me!” I hadn’t really meant to say it all out loud.
“Hey!” he yanked me to him, crushing me to his chest. “Stop it! Stop that.” He pulled back for a second, forcing me to look at him, and gave me a little shake. “Stop. I told you I wouldn’t let anything happen to youorto me. I’ve got this.”
“Dude, I’m sorry I had you guys come over here,” Chris said. “I didn’t want anyone to hear us, but maybe this was a bad idea. I just need you to leave. Out of town, just for a bit. Is there someone in Chicago you can stay with, maybe a cop friend? Someone who could help keep you both safe? I’ll figure this out, I just need a little more time, and worrying about you isn’t helping.”
“Listen,” Mason said. “Can you hold them off until tomorrow? We just need to think, just for a minute, and he’s drunk right now. Let me get him home, sober him up, let us talk. I’ll figure something out, but don’t think I’m just going to hide and let you do this alone. I’m taking these bastards down.”
“You’ll be fine tonight,” Chris said. “You have until the DNA tests come back, but you need to take off before then. They can’t do much with the shirt, because why the fuck would a murderer take off his shirt at the crime scene? I think they’re getting sloppy, but that means they want to be done. I won’t be able to get him out of it if it’s his hair and fingerprints in the victim’s fucking blood.”Okay, that was worse than I expected. “So just begone before it comes back, alright? I don’t know how they’re getting everything, but they don’t feel like seasoned criminals. Even so, they’re fucking clever when they try.”
Mason nodded. “Okay. We’re going to talk, once he sleeps this off.” He pulled me back toward the stairs. “Let’s go home,” he said softly. “I’ve got the gun and we’ll make sure everything’s locked up tight. We’ll be okay tonight.” I just nodded weakly.
“Call me if anything seems off,” Chris called out. “I’ll be up all night and there as fast as I can.” Mason just nodded and led me to the door.
