But it’s what he wants.
He’s made this abundantly clear over and over. I thought maybe I could change his mind there for a little while, but he’s proved what he truly wants.
Not me.
I’m strong and I’ll keep reminding myself every day if it’s what gets me through these heartbreaking moments. It’ll be what keeps me going when Buck cries in the middle of the nightto be fed and I’m all alone because Rhett is sleeping next to another woman.
My child will need that version of me.
Resilient and filled with fire.
For now, though, I’m going to allow myself a good cry.
Headlights shine in through the closed curtains, and my heart skips several beats. Both cats meow happily. We all know what this means. Seconds later, keys unlock the front door and Rhett walks in.
The robot version is gone.
His hair is slightly disheveled, eyes ringed dark with fatigue, and his beautiful mouth is turned into an unhappy frown.
Until he sees me.
I watch in awe as his face lights up and transforms into one bordering on joy. He closes the door behind him and locks it. Then, he stalks over to me on the couch. His cologne swirls around me and it has its usual effect. I feel safe and little Buck dances inside me.
He doesn’t ask why there are crumpled tissues all around me or why I’ve been crying. My emotions have been wrecked since the day he put this baby inside me. Plus, he’s in tune with me enough to read between the lines. These feelings we have for each other are messy and complicated, but they’re always there running amuck. Behind the façade he’s put on lately, I know deep down they’re there.
All the sadness seeps out of me when he kicks off his shoes and sits on the couch, crushing a mountain of used tissues. Then, he scoops me up and pulls me into his lap. I melt against him burying my nose against the side of his neck. His palm finds my belly, and he rubs it gently while kissing my hair.
I wish I could pause this moment.
Right here, right now, everything is perfect. We’re a family. Bonded and happy to be around each other. His arms are strongand comforting. The aching loneliness that drags me under each night has vanished.
“You okay?” I ask, voice hoarse and trembling.
“Perfect now.”
My heart squeezes in my chest. “Me too.”
His palm slides away from my belly to cradle my jaw. Then, he tilts my head up until we’re staring at one another. I get lost in his intense stare, marveling over how handsome he is. I hope our baby boy gets his adorable blond curls.
He closes his eyes and inches his face toward mine. This is my opportunity to push him away. Remind him he has Angela. But I part my lips, needing him desperately. His lips are soft at first as they brush over mine. Then, he makes a needy groan before devouring my mouth.
Truth be told, I’ve never been kissed like this. Like I’m the most precious person on the planet. Rhett kisses me like he’s trying to bind our souls together permanently. An unspoken vow much more powerful than one of marriage. I let him show me through his kisses how much I mean to him.
A sharp pain radiates from my back around my stomach to the front. It’s enough that I gasp and tense up. When Rhett starts to pull back, I spear my fingers into his soft curls, urging him to stay lip-locked with me. He freezes and then melts, kissing me more passionately than before. Fire burns down my spine, and I yearn for more with him.
The pain comes back but I’m able to suffer through it without flinching.
“Honey,” Rhett murmurs, lips ghosting over mine. “You taste so good.”
I smile and he kisses it away. I’m not sure how long we make out on my couch for. Feels like blissful eternity. Aside from the stupid pains that keep assaulting me and threatening to ruin the moment, I’m incredibly happy.
“I love…”
I freeze at his words, pulling back so I can see his face. His eyes bore into mine, burning with intensity. Swallowing, I wait for him to finish his statement.
“I love…” he starts again, voice raspy.
You. I love you.
