“If you ever get lonely, or if trouble finds you and you’re not sure how to be brave, close your eyes and reach for her there.”
Lex and her sister whimper, slipping their arms around my waist and neck. As I stroke their hair, I hear Demi’s fading voice brush against my mind.Squeeze my girls tight for me.
From now on, I will, I push back to her.
The elder daughter pulls away, touching my cheek softly. “Did Mommy die to protect you, Aunt Vessa? Daddy said that bad men took you away.”
My throat bobs. “She did. And I made sure to tell her I would always be here for you, any time you need me.”
Willa wipes another tear away, embracing me fully. She muffles a sob into my shoulder.
Axe strides over to the bench, taking a seat beside me. He bends to press a kiss to each niece’s forehead. His eyes are rimmed red as he takes the three of us and our heavy hearts in his arms.
My brows wrinkle as I notice a crushed letter in his fist. Axe nods pliantly, opening his hand to let me assess it. I press the paper against the base of the bench, smoothing it over. It’s an official notice from the capital, signed by all twelve members of the presiding Council. We are due to report in Yinsew for a disciplinary hearing in twenty-four hours. If we fail to show, we face an immediate seize and arrest.
“Aunt Vessa?” asks Lex. I wince as she coils tighter around my mending ribs.
“What happened to Mommy . . . it wasn’t your fault.”
My lips part with a quiver. Beside me, Axe says nothing, only encouraging me with a kiss to my temple.
“Thank you, Lex,” I choke, gaping at the six-year-old in wonder.
With a depleted sigh,I stare out the airplane window. I’ve already thrown up in the bathroom twice since our takeoff an hour ago. Slowly, I force myself to guzzle down a thermos of ice water.
My daze is snapped as Tesni plants herself in the seat across from me, mouth downturned. “I apologize if it seems like if I’ve been shunning you. This week—well, it’s been hell.”
I dip my head in agreement. "I understand, given everything that's happened, if you no longer wish to train me."
Tesni unclenches her fist, allowing the rest of her toned body to soften. "What you did back there . . . You made those monsters pay for what they did to Demi. Risked your neck to get the other captive girls out. Like any trueborn Luna would do. I amgratefulfor your courage. And your defiance. If my friend wished to see you become a warrior, we will not dishonor her.”
"You—you want to keep working with me?"
The Sentinel nods, a corner of her mouth subtly lifting. I bite down on my quivering lower lip, staring at my folded hands.
“If you don’t mind me asking, how did you do it?”
I’m still dumbfounded myself. Maybe it was all those mind-stilling exercises. Albeit, in my state of dehydration, I shouldn’t have been able to swing my fist, let alone sprint down the hallway or bash a lycan’s nose with a gun. But it came so innately. That vehement surge of rage.
“I suppose it was all the adrenaline,” I admit. “But there was a distinct moment where I felt the pain become too much and all at once, this cold stillness took over. With that rifle in my hands, I wasn’t afraid anymore. I blocked everything out.”
Tesni pauses to take this in. “It’s called the killing calm.”
Oh, I silently mouth.
"What if . . . what if I'm too broken to resume training?”
Tesni’s gaze shifts to the medic, who approaches the empty seat next to me. "We’ll give your body the time it needs to heal," she answers. "And then we’ll begin again.”
I nod, relieved that I have this to look forward to. Encouraged that she still sees a kernel of strength in me.
As she slips out of her seat, she adds, "Just so we’re clear—you're not broken, Vessa. You never were."
Cora sinks down next me and watches the Sentinel reclaim her seat towards the front. “She’s right, you know.”
She hasn’t asked about treating the wound that hasn’t visibly presented. The trauma taking root in my mind. When the panel questions me today, they will not be sensitive. They will be thorough and want explanations for every injury, every ordeal. In addition to my testimony, Cora will have to give an in-depth medical synopsis about what I went through, forcing me to re-live nearly a week of torment.
Cora swallows tightly. “At least, that’s what I remember after I took the stand following my pack’s slaughter. My mother was too delicate to testify, and my father was one of the first to give his life alongside the Alpha. If not I, then who would speak to all the horrors?”
