“Whimsical,” Cecilia told them with a delicate frown. She turned to where Pleasance stood in the doorway. “Dear, would you put on the kettle? Mr. Bixby and Miss Dearlove are joining us for morning tea.”
Morning tea?Alice mouthed behind her hand to Daniel. He shook his head, nonplussed.
Elsewhere in the field, pirates began drifting from their houses, servants laden with tea tables and parasols behind them. Cows watched in fascination; at a nearby farmhouse, someone was frantically barricading windows.
“Just a cup or two,” Cecilia said with a smile, “and then we will fly you back to London. After all, we have you to thank for saving my life, and—”
Beeeeep! Beeeeep! Beeeeep!
Cecilia’s smile tightened. “Evangeline dearest, can Mummy see your new toy? In return, you may play with my pearl-handled dagger.”
As a scuffle ensued between child and parents, Daniel took Alice by the elbow and led her aside. “Tea,” he said in a low voice.
“Conversation,” she added direly.
“Badminton!” Mrs. Ogden shouted from a short distance away, holding up a racket and a basket of grenades.
Daniel and Alice shared a panicked look.
And then, just in the nick of time, the cavalry arrived.
25
a fond farewell—not with a whimper but a bang— unexpected tea—a professional chitchat— an old beginning—the end
It had been the last dream of Alice’s soul that she escape from the Wisteria Society without further infliction of tea and entertainment. But when she saw the brick shed speeding low above the field toward her, unnoticed as yet by the rest of the company, with Agent M’s face visible at the flight window and salvation close at hand, she contemplated for one brief, vivid moment throwing away a lifetime’s duty and taking up the teapot of villainy instead.
Pirates were dreadful! raucous! endearing! They had shown her what it meant to be truly amiable. Over the past week, she’d been welcomed into company, asked her opinion, fussed over, and acknowledged as an individual more times than she had in her entire life.
(She’d also been threatened with torture and kidnapping, but that was beside the point.)
Having always believed herself contented alone, Alice was surprised now to realize the prospect of returning to the sober, isolating life of service did not seem as appealing as it had even one minutebeforehand. But that was nonsense! If asked to repeat a mission like this one, she’d never say “again”—never!
And yet...
As the little shed raced closer, churning up grass and dirt, Alice glanced at Cecilia Bassingthwaite. The red-haired young pirate was reciting a Byron verse to her daughter and making amusing faces to accompany it while Ned stole the handkerchief from Evangeline’s tiny hand.
“Anytime you wish, you are welcome to visit me and borrow a book from my library,”Cecilia had told her. Alice’s heart gave a little flinch of wondering shyness at the memory. She quickly looked away—and caught sight of Miss Darlington picking Mrs. Rotunder’s pocket while the latter argued with Mrs. Ogden about the proper length of time to steep tea.
“You certainly display moxie,”the grand old pirate had told her, what seemed like weeks ago, as Alice sat wet and shivering in herlairelegant sitting room.I can’t leave, Alice thought suddenly.I still don’t know what moxie is!
But the shed was upon them, skidding as it swiveled on one corner of its foundation before coming to rest. The pirates all looked up with an astonished gasp. “Well I never!” someone cried, and Alice came very close to laughing.
The shed door flew open and Mia Thalassi appeared, dressed in servant black, dark eyes flashing. She held out her hand. “Come with me if you want to give—!”
Suddenly she coughed, having breathed too fast, and pressed a hand against her throat.
“—your mission report today, back at headquarters!” she concluded weakly.
Alice found herself moving without thought—primarily because Daniel was pushing her toward the shed. She stumbled, and Miacaught her arm, pulling her inside. Seconds later, Daniel was behind her, hauling Snodgrass with him. The doctor complained incoherently through his gag, but Daniel shoved him to the floor. Slamming shut the door, Mia dashed for the wheel. Chanting Latin, she guided the shed into a soaring ascent.
Alice and Daniel staggered. The building was only ten feet square, containing nothing more than a munitions box, two small windows, and, painted on the wall, the A.U.N.T. rose entwining a set of kitchen scales, below which was written “Fealty, Dignity, Laundry.” Alice and Daniel had no recourse to stability other than gripping the walls the best they could. Snodgrass wailed as he rolled into a corner.
“Hold on!” Mia advised, spinning the wheel. The shed veered steeply, and Alice set her feet farther apart, her fingers digging into the clay seams between bricks. Wind was howling through invisible gaps in the walls. The door rattled.
“How did you find us?” Alice shouted over the noise.
“I was heading for Starkthorn Castle when I noticed the gathering of pirate houses,” Mia shouted in reply. “Using my deductive powers, not to mention my telescope, I—”
