Yet explaining that to the pair would do no good. However, Violet couldn’t allow them to harbor fantasies regarding Dr. Vaughn.
“Diana, you have personally witnessed just how impossible it is that any gentleman—let alone someone like Dr. Vaughn—would wish to court me.”
“Don’t be a ninny. You speak as though he is far above your reach, and frankly, it is quite the opposite,” said Diana with a dismissive wave. “I cannot imagine any lady desiring a man who hasn’t even a sprig of hair atop his head.”
The lady cringed, her mouth pulled into an expression of utter disgust, and Violet gaped at her.
“Not that he doesn’t have a lovely soul,” Diana hurried to add. “Everything I’ve heard speaks well of the gentleman, and though his smile is a bit odd, his features are pleasant enough. But you must admit that any lady willing to accept his suit would do so despite his hair.”
“Just as Lewis married medespitemy complexion and coloring?” asked Felicity with a raise of her brows.
Diana gaped. “Not at all! You are lovely.”
Violet met Felicity’s gaze, and the pair shared a silent sigh over the lady’s logic, which was as twisty as a hedge maze. But whether familial, platonic, or romantic, love wasn’t always logical.
“I think that anyone who values hair above character deserves the unhappy marriage they are bound to have, and it does you no justice to spout such nonsense, Diana,” said Violet with a frown. “But this has nothing to do with whether or not Dr. Vaughn is ‘above my reach’ or not. None of it alters the fact that in the eyes of men, I am not a viable prospect. You know my history. You witnessed much of it.”
“I know a thing or two about a bad history with men,” said Felicity with a frown. “Even if you run afoul of a few bounders, I assure you not all of them are.”
Violet gave a dry chuckle. “My troubles do not sprout from attracting the wrong men but from attracting none at all. I assure you that not a single man has ever regarded me as anything more than a friend or a sister.”
Diana gave a long-suffering sigh. “Now, Vi—”
“Mr. York,” said Violet in a monotone.
Her friend’s mouth snapped shut, and she drew in a sharp breath.
Turning an arched brow to Felicity, Violet explained, “When our vicar took up his post here, he was unmarried and drew quite a lot of female attention. To the astonishment of the entire parish, he spent his time in my company, forever spending his evenings with me until I was convinced that he harboredromantic intentions. Then one day, he gleefully declared his love—for a lady he’d been courting in Stoneford.”
Diana winced. “Yes, that was unfortunate, but—”
“Mr. Kempthorne,” added Violet.
That snapped her friend’s mouth shut once again.
“That gentleman acted so solicitous, being kind and generous to me as he was with no other lady. I was hesitant to expect anything, but my friends and family were certain he was going to ask Papa’s permission to court me.” Pausing, Violet gave the final sentence extra emphasis, “Until he announced his engagement to my friend, Miss Louisa Atwell.”
Glancing between the pair, Violet ticked off her fingers. “Then there was Mr. Wilson, Mr. Taylor, and Mr. Bradford. All of whom acted so flirtatious and affectionate that it would’ve made them honor-bound to marry me for raising expectations—except that no one but me or my well-intentioned family and friends could imagine those gentlemen would court a mannish woman.”
“You are not mannish,” said Felicity with a frown.
Violet didn’t bother correcting her. That was another argument she wouldn’t win, for though she was not viewed in such a light by those who valued her, it didn’t erase her vast experience that told her otherwise. It would be impossible to list everyone who had treated her thusly but, sufficeth to say, Mr. Sprat’s and Mr. Timms’ behavior wasn’t the least bit out of character. For some reason she could not comprehend, men did not see Violet Templeton as a woman.
For goodness’ sake, the village called herMr.Templeton for more reasons than her penchant for medicine.
Felicity opened her mouth again, and the moment she did, Violet knew what was going to come next. It was the same thing everyone always said during such discussions.
“Regardless of your low opinion of your outward attractions, you are talented and intelligent and would make any man a wonderful wife. He would be lucky to have you.”
Forcing her expression to remain placid, Violet refused to let those well-meaning sentiments dampen her spirits or resolve. Her worthiness wasn’t in doubt, for it was immutable—regardless of anyone else’s opinion or how many gentlemen rejected her. However, no matter how high a regard she held herself in, it didn’t alter the fact that her experience taught her again and again that her “low opinion of her outward attractions” was no opinion. It was fact.
Gentlemen did not find her beautiful.
But that did not diminish Violet Templeton’s value or talents. Not everyone could be lovely.
Holding up her hands in placation, Violet shook her head. “I do not wish to argue, but my own experience is vast on the subject, and I find it impossible to imagine capturing Dr. Vaughn’s affection when I’ve never even secured a dance with a gentleman who was interested in pursuing me. In truth, I am merely honored that Dr. Vaughn views me as a friend. With everything that has happened, I am lucky to have gained that much—”
Violet’s mouth snapped shut, and she drew in a sharp breath as words she hadn’t meant to say nearly slipped out. They didn’t need to know what effort she’d made to rid Oakham of Dr. Vaughn. No one need ever know. It had hardly been anything. Entirely unworthy of noting.
