There was still Miss Sheridan, and with more consideration, David did think her the likeliest of the four. He supposed he would discover the truth tomorrow night, as he had it on good authority that the family had returned home and were to attend the Breadmores’ party. That knowledge warmed his heart a touch, though it couldn’t chase away the chill seeping into him with each passing mile.
David frowned at the road ahead, guiding the horses in their circuit around the town. A niggling thought warned he was being rude, and he ought to say something to Mrs. Ellery, but each subject he attempted fared as well as lighting a fire in the wind: conversation sparked for a bright moment before dying.
Shifting his reins again, David rubbed at his face. He’d been foolhardy to make this appointment today, for he was in no fit state to converse with the lady. To his thinking, friendship was an easy thing or it did not exist. Not that it didn’t require effort at times, but such sputtering was hardly promising.
And foremost, David wanted a wife who was a friend and a sweetheart. Not one or the other.
Father was likely home by now. The thought made David’s chest ache. Having him in residence was a double-edged sword; it was easier to curtail his antics whilst he was in Greater Edgerton, but maintaining the pretense that Mr. Thaddeous Archer was the master of Rawlston Mill took so much more effort. Father cared little either way, but too many of the gentlemen trusted the elder Mr. Archer’s years over the younger’s experience and sound judgment.
And it was beyond vexing to have everything humming along at the mill, only to discover that Father had struck up a terrible deal with someone line Mr. Kellen.
A pox on Grandfather. Father’s decisions in life were certainly his own, but had the old man insisted on Father taking more responsibility in his youth, perhaps things would not be so complicated for David. But the self-made man had wanted a gentleman for an heir and treated him as such, leaving Mr. Thaddeous Archer with the business sense of a horse. Perhaps less, for at least a horse was trainable. Father refused bridle or saddle.
Scrubbing at his face once more, David struggled to keep his eyes open. They felt as though they were made of lead, sinking lower despite his best efforts. But Mrs. Ellery remained silent at his side, providing no distraction from his exhaustion.
Thankfully, the town came back into view, and they quickly arrived at Mrs. Ellery’s cottage. It was a small and simple building, though tastefully situated, with vines crawling up the sides and large bushes circling it, and in high summer when everything was blooming, it was a picture of tranquility. David needed a bit of peace, but instead, he was left struggling to know what to say to Mrs. Ellery as he helped her down.
“That was quite enjoyable,” she said, though there was a tightness to her smile that belied her polite words.
“Thank you for joining me,” he said with a nod.
Pausing on her doorstep, Mrs. Ellery held his gaze. “Perhaps we might go again?”
Only the mightiest exercise of self-control kept David from frowning. Though her question might be deemed a polite inquiry, the hope in her eyes testified that she was in earnest. Despite the fact that he would lay a large wager that she hadn’t, in fact, enjoyed herself at all.
But then, a struggling widow had few options for securing her financial position, and with Mr. Ellery’s debts, David doubted she could be discerning about her second husband—which sent a skitter of unease running down his spine, both for the terrible situation and that he might’ve given her reason to believe he would welcome such a transactional marriage.
Mrs. Ellery was pleasant enough, but David desired so much more.
“I fear the weather won’t allow it,” he said with a bow. “Though I have no doubt our paths will cross from time to time.”
Mrs. Ellery managed not to frown, though his tone made his intention clear. Drawing in a deep breath, she nodded. “Certainly, Mr. Archer. I wish you well.”
“And you, Mrs. Ellery.” David turned and all but ran back to the carriage. Not every outing led to courtship, yet he still felt as though he’d pained her.
Blast this wretched business! How was a man to know a lady without an outing or two? Yet to do so gave rise to beliefs that too often left one of the pair hurting. But there was nothing to be done about it. That was the nature of courtship. Like its name, one could liken it to a boat that sank every time but once; as such, the mariners ought to be hesitant to take it out on open water.
David’s thoughts swirled about, touching on Father, business, Mrs. Ellery, and his Mystery Lady, before settling once more on Miss Leigh and the many questions that surrounded her. So many aspects of his life were unsettled.
For all that he hadn’t thought much about matrimony before the Mystery Lady swept into his life, he’d spent plenty of time considering the subject since then. That night at the masquerade, he’d been given a glimpse of something magnificent.
He knew no one comprehended why that evening had mattered so much to him, but only a few hours in her company had shown the Lady to be engaging and empathetic, understanding him better than any stranger ought. It was as though the bits of himself he’d shared had been lifted from his shoulders, borne up by more than him alone, allowing him to breathe as he hadn’t done since taking the reins of his family’s finances at the tender age of sixteen.
With so many depending on him, David had no desire to add a wife to his burden, but in those few hours, he’d glimpsed the possibility of what being a marriage could be. A wife was a partner, not an obligation. And now that the hope had taken root in his heart, he couldn’t turn it aside.
Was his Mystery Lady only a mirage? A mere trick of his addled wits? Or the desperate longing of his heart manifesting?
Shoulders falling, David forced himself to focus on the horses and guided them through the town, narrowly avoiding a few collisions as he struggled to keep himself awake. Thankfully, the grooms were on hand in a trice once he arrived home, and with heavy footsteps, he trudged through the front door.
Despite crossing Mrs. Ellery from the list of candidates, David felt no closer to an answer.
Chapter 28
“David?” called Mother’s voice as he crossed the threshold, and heaven help him, he cringed and eyed the nearby stairs. But she called several more times, the sound coming closer as she hurried through the corridor. Emerging in the doorway to the parlor, she stared at him with wide eyes. “Have you read the newspaper?”
Drawing in a low breath, David held it for a count of three. He’d taken the newspaper with him to the mill this morning specifically to avoid this conversation. How had she gotten her hands on a copy?
“Do not worry yourself, Mother—”
