“And I’ve failed at every attempt.”
“Give them time, sir. They cannot help but warm to your overtures.”
Mr. Byrnes gave a low grunt, his eyes narrowing for a moment as he considered her. “The whole situation is quite unfair, Miss Delmonte. I only wish to be their papa, and they have treated me so poorly. I do not know what I’ve done to earn their ire. No matter what I do, they despise and judge me, and I’ve only ever done my utmost to be a good father to them. Perhaps I can make them see all the sacrifices I’ve made for them.”
Judith clenched her teeth while clinging to her calm expression. Little muscles here and there tightened despite her determination to remain even-tempered, but his complaints were such balderdash. Mr. Byrnes continued, waxing poetic about his struggles as a father and the trials he faced while laying the blame on his children’s shoulders. From the manner in which he moped, one might think he was the victim of cruel fate, which had set itself against this poor, hapless man.
“You truly have no concept of how difficult it is for me,” he said with a shake of his head.
And with that, Judith’s good sense flew right out the window.
“Difficult is losing your mother. Difficult is being shipped off to stay with your aunt and uncle who have no children and no idea how to manage three grieving that loss. Difficult is finding yourself in the care of a relative stranger who demands you welcome him with open arms.” Judith paused for breath, her temper giving way to reason once more. She forced the bite from her tone, infusing it with a touch of quiet humility in hopes that it would ease the sting of her rebuke as she continued, “Mr. Byrnes, a few small overtures cannot overcome such difficulties. You are correct in saying I have a good rapport with the children. It took time before they embraced me, yet you wish for them to do so immediately.”
Judith’s breath caught, and she held onto her composure all while a string of litanies swept through her thoughts. She’d manage to hold her tongue for nearly two decades in this position. How had she not done so now?
Chapter 9
Aslow, broad smile stretched across Mr. Byrnes’s face, and Judith’s lungs seized for a new reason. Gracious, he was far too alluring for her good. And for the second time that day, she chided herself for behavior unbefitting a governess. Was she determined to get herself dismissed?
“I wondered how long it would take for you to speak your mind, Miss Delmonte.” Mirth laced his tone, and those rich eyes of his shone with it as he examined her. “I was about to debase myself entirely.”
“I do not understand your meaning, sir.” Judith allowed a bit of the prim governess to show through at that moment.
“Don’t be coy,” he said with a shake of his head. “I know you have spirit and intelligence, yet when I am earnestly seeking your honest advice, you play the timid governess. It seems you will only speak out if I am entirely annoying and ridiculous.”
But Mr. Byrnes’s expression grew serious, that laughter tucking away beneath a furrowed brow and downturned lips. “I am no fool, Miss Delmonte. I need your assistance if I am to succeed, and I need you to be forthright and honest with me.”
Judith was certain he didn’t understand what he was asking her to do. It seemed a simple thing, but a servant’s living was not a sure thing. A master could dismiss them on a whim, leaving them adrift in the world without references. Judith had enough mistresses who would recommend her that she would not be wholly ruined, but being dismissed for insubordination never reflected well on the servant.
Yet, she would be guilty of that if she denied his request. Judith was between the proverbial hammer and the anvil at present with any decision likely to upset and offend.
“Being honest and forthright is problematic for a servant,” said Judith.
His lips turned into an appreciative smile. “I am well aware of how difficult it is for those of lower ranks to address those above them. I have spent most of my life aboard a ship in which such hierarchies are strictly observed, and like you, I learned to keep my peace, but I have no interest in mimicking the examples of poor leadership I’ve seen in the past. A captain may outrank his crew, but he’ll never succeed in his position if he insists on ignoring or silencing those beneath him. The best captains listen to the experienced sailors on the ship—whatever their rank.”
That was intriguing and perhaps the first time she’d ever heard a master or mistress express such radical beliefs. For all her experience, Mr. Byrnes was upending her expectations, and Judith couldn’t be certain if she welcomed or feared the change. Being silenced was not a happy thing, but there was comfort in the familiar.
Mr. Byrnes sighed and lowered his head for a moment before he met her gaze again. “Miss Delmonte, I am struggling, and I need your guidance. If I am to succeed, I cannot have a mute partner.”
Judith couldn’t believe she was even contemplating this. Had she not warned Alice to placate the master and mistress when questioned? What Mr. Byrnes was asking went against her years of experience, yet something in her heart warmed to the idea.
“And if you do not like what I have to say?” she asked.
“Diverging opinions is not a bad thing, Miss Delmonte, and only a fool silences them,” he said with another warm smile. “I cannot promise to like what you say, but as long as you continue to do your work with the skill and dedication you’ve shown so far, I shan’t dismiss you for disagreeing with me. I give you my word.”
Good gracious, he sounded so very serious when he said that. Despite the lightness of his expression, Mr. Byrnes spoke that vow with utter conviction, and Judith’s heart told her to trust it for the children’s sake if nothing else.
“Now, Miss Delmonte,” he said, holding her gaze with that same pleading and determination he’d shown throughout the conversation. “Please tell me what I am to do.”
It would take a heart far colder and harder than hers to turn away that petition, and though a niggling thought worried she was making a very large mistake, Judith embraced the impulse that loosened her tongue.
“Continue to try, Mr. Byrnes,” she said. “I know it is not what you wish to hear, but you cannot hope to win them over in one sennight. It will take time and effort on your part. Especially with Helen.”
“Why does she dislike me so?” he asked.
She sorted through that which Helen had said and that which Judith had surmised before she answered. “I will not break her confidence, but I can say that Helen was close to her mama and took the loss very hard. And though she pretends not to care, she has been hurt by your absence.”
His brow furrowed into deep ridges, his sailor’s complexion looking all the more craggy for it. “I had little choice in the matter. I was a sailor with no other profession.”
