“My heart goes out to her, as well. I cannot even comprehend what must be going through her mind right now. I wouldn’t know what kind of advice to give her.”
Tabitha folded her arms and leaned against the wall. “Really, there’s not much that can be done. If she stays here to have her child, her family will be embarrassed and greatly shamed. If that happens, she’ll be shunned by Society. If she wants to continue to live a normal life, she can either find another man to marry, or she can have her family send her to the countryside someplace out of the way to have the baby. If Frederick knows of any childless couples, he can arrange an adoption that way. If not, the child will have to go to an orphanage.”
“You are very knowledgeable on the subject. I’m sure you have known other young girls who were in the family way without a husband.”
Irritation creased Tabitha’s face and she curled her lip in disdain. “Lord Elliot had impregnated many of his servants, that’s how I know. In fact, Sally was one of them.”
Nic gasped and rose to his feet. “Sally?”
“She was pregnant when Lord Elliot nearly beat her to death. We thought she might lose the baby, but she didn’t. She delivered two months ago and gave her child to a couple who couldn’t have children. Servants don’t have to suffer being shunned from Society, but we still are shamed beyond belief. Sally is taking this very well, and has seemed to flourish here in North Devon. I think it’s because nobody knows her.”
He moved slowly toward Tabitha. Thankfully, she didn’t try to get away. Sadness clouded her pretty face, and he would do anything to remove it. When he stood in front of her, he lifted her hand to his mouth and brushed his lips over her knuckles. “Please forgive me for making you relive a time in your life you’d rather forget.”
She released a slow breath of air. “I wish it had never happened, but it’s part of my past whether I want it to be or not. However, being in North Devon, I have felt a sense of freedom I thought I’d never have. Sometimes I actually feel normal.”
“No, my lovely.” He shook his head and cupped her face. “You’re far from normal. You’re exceptional…an astonishing woman that lights up a room just by entering. Don’t ever forget that.”
The corner of her mouth quirked up in a grin. “As always, Lord Hawthorne, you’re saying words I don’t know if I can believe.”
“You can believe them.” He winked.
As much as he wanted to kiss her right now, he found the courage to step back. It was hard, but it must be done. He needed her to make the next step in their relationship. How elsewould he know when she was ready to love him and give him her heart? “So tell me, what brings you to my office today?”
She appeared bewildered for a moment, but then blinked and shook her head. “Oh yes, I remember now. I wanted to talk to you before you come to have lunch with my aunt tomorrow afternoon.”
“Is something amiss?”
Chuckling, she rolled her eyes. “I would think it was, considering both Aunt Clara and Mrs. Stiles are playing matchmaker. I warned you about this, remember?”
He grinned. “Yes, you did. So what do you want me to do about it?”
“I want you to convince them that we don’t suit. Somehow, you need to make them believe that you don’t find me interesting in the least.”
“Oh, my lovely Tabitha.” He laughed. “It would take a true performer to pull that off. Even a blind person would be able to tell how much I care about you, because I’m sure they’d hear it in my voice.”
“Please, Nic.” She walked to him and laid her hand on his arm. “We must do something to stop them. Have you forgotten our talk yesterday?”
“No. I’ll never forget the times we spend together or what was said.”
“Then you see why we need to do this.”
“Yes, but I’m just saying that it’s going to be hard.”
She nodded. “I understand, but I want you to try, anyway.”
“Of course, my lovely. I’ll do anything for you.”
She tilted her head, studying him for a few moments. He hoped it didn’t take her long before she realized he was being truthful.
With a nod, she stepped away from him and breathed a heavy sigh. “Well then, now that I have said what I came to say, I’ll be leaving.”
She lifted her cloak off the chair and proceeded to wrap it around her shoulders. He moved closer and assisted. Once she had her bonnet on, she strode toward the door.
“Wait,” he called out, stopping her. “Let me go out to see if anyone is out there. We don’t want anyone witnessing you leaving my private chambers.”
“Oh, yes. Thank you for remembering.”
As he passed her, the urge to take her in his arms and hold her was strong. But unwavering, he walked out of the room without touching her. He gazed around the chapel area and couldn’t see anyone. Still, he felt she shouldn’t leave out the front doors. She’d been seen right away.
