He wasn’t prepared for the emptiness that consumed him at the mere thought. He didn’t want to let her go, but he knew he must. No other woman would be able to fill that void in his heart once she was gone.
Not another word was spoken until he drove back to the inn and stopped the carriage. He helped her down, and they slowly walked upstairs toward their rooms. His room was closer than the one she shared with Lady Sarah, so before he could change his mind, he grabbed Emiline’s hand and pulled her inside his room, shut the door, and turned on the lamp.
“Broderick? What—”
“Shh…” He gathered her in his arms. “I just wanted to hold you before returning you to Lady Sarah.”
She wrapped her arms around his waist as she tilted her head to look at him. A soft smile graced her stunning face, her brown eyes sparkling with tenderness.
“Although I want nothing more than to stay in your arms, don’t you have to go back to Mr. Goodfellow’s party to get your family?”
“In a little while. My aunt and uncle will be there another hour at least.” He removed her hat and stroked her silky hairthat had been pulled tight in a bun. “For now, all I want to do is hold you.”
“But why?”
“Because our time is limited.” He carefully pulled out the pins holding her coil together, and her long hair cascaded over her shoulders and down her back.
“It is?”
He nodded. “Soon you will be reunited with your mother, and you will want to be with her. You and Lady Sarah will return to Devonshire, and… and I will never see you again.”
“Never say never.” She frowned.
“But it’s true. You will soon forget about me, and eventually, I will forget about you.” He cupped her face with both hands, caressing her cheeks with his thumbs. “But the way I’m feeling right now, I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to forget you.” He bent his head and captured her lips.
Sighing, she leaned into him. The kiss was tender and thrilled him beyond anything he had ever experienced. His heart pounded so hard he thought it might break some bones in his chest. Yet the longer he kissed her, the more his heart ached with sadness.
Reluctantly, he broke the kiss and trailed his lips over her cheek. “Oh, Emiline, I don’t think I’ll be able to let you go. The mere thought of your leaving me is tearing my insides apart, and I cannot stand the pain.” He moved his lips up to her eyes and brushed them across her closed lids. “Emiline, my love, I want you in a way I have wanted no other woman. You have somehow crept into my heart, and I cannot seem to get you out.”
Her breathing had grown fast and heavy, as had his.
“Broderick? Why do you want to get me out of your heart?”
“Because this is wrong. We are wrong for each other.”
“No, Broderick. We are alike in so many ways.”
“No… no… You are all wrong for me. These feelings I have for you may just well destroy both of us.”
She pulled away just enough for him to stare down into her smiling eyes. “What would you say if I told you I hold the same confused feelings?”
He drew his thumb across her bottom lip, wanting to kiss her again so badly. “I would say we were both in serious trouble, then.”
“I don’t mind it in the least. As long as we can be in serious trouble together.”
Groaning, he pulled her in for another kiss, wrapping his arms around her to hold her as he devoured her mouth. Kissing her was heavenly, yet he knew he would be in hell if he enjoyed it any further. No matter how much he didn’t want to be away from her, being with her was impossible. Indeed, his way of life and the way she was raised could never work.
Hesitantly, he broke the kiss and stepped away. Her lips were swollen due to his ardent kisses, yet her eyes were laced with desire. As much as he should remain strong, she would always be able to bring him to his knees.
“Come. Let’s return you to Lady Sarah. I need to get back to the party.” He pulled at the overcoat and waistcoat. “And I need to return these clothes to Phillip.”
“No, Broderick.” She grasped his hand, keeping him from going anywhere. “If you think this might be our last time together, then… let’s make it memorable.” Her beautiful eyes watered and her lips quivered. “I want you in my heart forever.”
Helpless to stop the emotions inside of him, he gathered her in his arms again, bringing his mouth over hers. She clung to him, trying to pull him closer. The rogue inside of him desperately wanted Emiline. Now. Yet the gentlemen he knew he should be reminded him that she was too special to use. However, he didn’t believe he was using her for his ownsatisfaction. After all, the feelings in his heart told him that this was, indeed, love.
Tonight, he would make this memorable for them both.
Chapter Seventeen
