“You saved me from harm tonight,” she countered.
“You saved yourself, along with everyone else, when you let loose with your pepperbox.”
“You were holding off the assailants as well.”
“But assailants shouldn’t have been a factor at all this evening. I shouldn’t have agreed to the book salon plan to begin with, but I did because...” His voice trailed away, earning a narrowing of her eyes in the process.
“Because why?”
“That’s not important. What is important is that I should not have let you become involved with fieldwork in the first place. It was irresponsible on my part, but my irresponsibility toward you ends as of this moment.”
“What does that mean?”
“It means you can no longer be involved with the accounting firm, not even looking over old files for us.”
“That’s not fair.”
“It may not be fair, but it’ll keep you alive. It was only sheer luck you weren’t killed tonight.”
Her eyes flashed. “And to that I say rubbish. Besides, if you’ve forgotten, because of my actions, even if they were unexpected, we were able to uncover answers that have evaded us for weeks.”
“You’re not going to change my mind.”
“You’re being unreasonable.”
“I’m being realistic. I decided years ago that I wouldn’t become involved with a lady until I was much older, but then ... you stumbled into my life when you caught on fire, and from that moment forward, I have felt driven to protect you. I’ve done an abysmal job of that, ignored my better instincts, and have pulled you into my world, where I’ve now realized, without a shadow of a doubt, that you don’t belong.”
“What if I promise to never venture into fieldwork again, and content myself with those old files?”
He closed his eyes for the briefest of seconds. “You know, because it’s you, that you’ll end up stumbling upon something you shouldn’t know or figure out a clue that’ll land you in direct danger again. I can’t be responsible for frequently placing your life in jeopardy. With that said, and as much as I hate to say this, it’ll be for the best if we make a clean break of everything and say good-bye.”
Her mouth quivered the slightest bit. “Good-bye? As in you not only don’t want me involved with the accounting firm but you also no longer care to be my friend?”
He drew in a deep breath, determined to keep his resolve, no matter that the distress visible on her face was driving a knife through his heart. “I will always consider you one of my dearest friends, but I can’t continue seeing you, Adelaide. I have enemies who, if they realize you’re important to me, will use you to get to me. I can’t allow that to happen.”
“And I have no say in this? If you’ve forgotten, it’s my life. You can’t tell me how I should live it or expect me to return to the monotony of society after experiencing the world you inhabit. I won’t agree to that. I need more.”
“You’ll have your bookstore and more cats to save since society seems to be taking an interest in them. You’ll also have young ladies to rescue, ones who would be lingering against walls without your assistance.”
“Which is all well and good, but again, it’s not enough.”
“It going to have to be, because I cannot subject you to the hazards of my world ever again.” He leaned forward, drew in a breath, committed her scent to memory, then placed a kiss on her forehead before he drew back. “I’ll tell Camilla to begin spreading whispers that you’ve decided we won’t suit.” He forced a smile. “I’m sure there will be many relieved gentlemen who’ll be more than anxious to step up and escort you around town.”
He wiped away a single tear that was trailing down Adelaide’s cheek. “I hope someday you’ll be able to remember me with some fondness, but I understand you probably won’t feel anything but anger toward me for a very long time. Know that I will cherish the time we’ve spent together and know that I wish things could be different.” He caught her eye. “If you could promise me one thing before I go?”
“That would depend on what you want me to promise.”
His lips curved on their own accord. “There’s that practicality I’m going to miss. But if you could promise to try and keep yourself out of trouble, I’d sleep better at night since I won’t be around to watch over you.”
“I don’t need anyone to watch over me. Besides, I always seem to land on my feet after my debacles, which certainly aren’t going to end simply because you’re not around. However, if it makes you feel better, I’ll try to stay out of trouble, but I don’t go looking for trouble. It simply finds me.” She jerked her head toward the door. “I don’t believe we have anything left to discuss, so you should go find Marshall. I’ll have Leopold and Vernon see me safely home.”
Knowing he’d been dismissed, and rightly so, Gideon pressed a kiss against her fingers, released his hold on her hand, then strode for the door, his vision blurry as he let himself out into the snow-covered alley behind the bookstore.
As he strode down it, he realized that saying good-bye to Adelaide might be the hardest thing he’d ever have to do in his life. And even though he wished he could rush back to her and beg her forgiveness, tell her that he was in love with her, since he’d realized as he was saying good-bye to her that he certainly was, he knew he’d made the only decision that would keep her safe—even if that decision meant he would not get to spend the rest of his life with the one lady who suited him in every way.
Twenty-Eight
“I made excuses for you at Mrs. Aldrich’s tea,” Phyllis said, strolling into the music room, her eyes widening when she caught sight of Adelaide sitting on the bench in front of the piano. “You’re playing the piano?”
