“This is ridiculous,” I say through my laughter.
The keypad finally flashes green, and Quinn yells, “Vittoria!”
Inez is reading a book in the living room when we come in, and Quinn’s laughter abruptly cuts off.
“How was your visit with your friend?” Quinn asks, something tight in her voice.
Inez smiles, but it looks more like a wince. “It was amazing.”
Quinn lets out an almost manic laugh. “That’s awesome! So exciting! Hey, why don’t we break into one of these bottles, yeah?”
She twirls toward the kitchen before either of us can respond. I raise a brow at Inez, but she shrugs and follows after Quinn, talking to her in a low voice.
The rest of the night’s a blur of more wine and probably not enough charcuterie for our dinner. After a whole day of drinking, Quinn and I are both ready to pass out by ten, but when I finally settle into bed, I can’t shut off my brain.
Things have shifted between us, and I don’t know if it’s a good thing or not. We’ve both grown and changed since college, but I still love her as much as I did when she dropped me off at the airport ten years ago. More, even. And the idea of losing her presence in my life still guts me. Of course I want her, but I’d take a lifetime of her friendship over a few hours of something physical.
I’m staring at the ceiling when there is a light knock on my door.
“Yeah?” I call, pushing myself to lean back against the wooden headboard. The door cracks open, revealing Quinn.
“Can I come in?” she asks with a quiver in her voice.
“Of course,” I say, and she scrambles onto the other side of the full bed, laying her head on the pillow facing me. I mirror her position. “Finally ready to talk to me?”
Her lips quirk up, but her eyes stay sad. “I was kind of a buzzkill today, wasn’t I?”
“You’re never a buzzkill.”
“It’s sweet when you lie to me,” she says, her smile growing.
“Fine, you were a bit of a buzzkill.” I laugh, and she reachesout to poke my dimple. “But only because I was worried about you. What happened?”
Quinn chews on her lip. “Inez wasn’t visiting a friend today. She was meeting with Leonardo da Vinci.”
I suck in a breath through my teeth. “Is it safe to assume you mean the school and not that one of the greatest minds of all time has been reanimated?”
Quinn laughs and flops onto her back, the first full smile I’ve seen all day stretching her mouth wide. “You’re the worst.”
“Thank you,” I say, and she turns back to me, the smile fading to something softer. “Was she meeting about a job?”
Quinn nods. “She’s tired of all the tension on campus and is considering other options.”
I watch Quinn closely, the way she constantly rolls her lips together like she’s actively fighting whatever words are trying to escape and how her gaze looks past me to the little window like she can’t handle sustained eye contact or risk breaking.
“And you’re scared about what happens if she takes it?”
She blinks quickly. “Of course I am. We’ve been together for a decade. First in graduate school, and then both starting at Billings right after graduation.”
“The nice thing about living in the twenty-first century is we’ve got great technology.”
“I know, but what if we lose touch with her across an ocean?”
“You didn’t lose touch with me,” I say.
Her eyes snap back to mine. “Yeah, but you’re you.”
A warmth unfurls in my chest. I’ve always been happy that Quinn found Inez, but there’s a little part of me that will always feel a bit jealous that she has someone else who fills a similar role to me. Hearing that I’m different is a confirmation that she feels all the same big emotions that have always swirled around our friendship.
