Ihaveto get tenure. If I don’t, I can’t cover my expenses. My mom would lose the house she loves so much, the first true home she’s ever had.
I’m not only down a recommendation, but now I have someone who’s actively working against my success. Even if I were willing to walk it back—which I’m not, Quinn doesn’t deserve that—I don’t think Richard is the type to forgive and forget. A few subtle comments here, a rejected conference presentation proposal there, and he’ll make it clear where he stands on my work.
I move through the rest of the dinner on autopilot, numb to the world around me. But that numbness mutates into fury as I walk home. How could Quinn do that? How could she hide this from me, let me believe that I won it on my own merit?
But all other thoughts fly out of the window when I walk through the door to our apartment to find something so much worse than the fight I’d already started in my head.
33
QUINN
The differencebetween where this summer started and where it’s ending is astounding.
I’m at the final dinner for the program, sandwiched between Sydney and Lynn. The students laugh and joke at their own tables, trading stories about the summer and swiping away sneaky tears that escape now and then. I remember that feeling, the heartbreaking realization that life will never be this perfect, this magical, again. That even though these people and this moment will live vividly in my mind, the beauty of this moment will never be recaptured.
To my utter shock, the faculty and staff table is just as comfortable. We share our own stories, and when I speak, the professors give me their undivided attention. I even earn a few chuckles from Dr. Guarino. I catch Inez’s eyes, widening mine in shock.
I was shooting for mutual—if begrudging—respect this summer, but this is so much more. It’s fun and honest and comfortable, and I can see the future of Billings. The seven of us coming home and setting the new standard, the others following behind and reaching for the bar we’ve lifted.
“Oh, Quinn,” Andrea says from down the table. “I spoke with the English department chair yesterday, and she loves the workshop idea.”
I flick my eyes over to Inez, letting her see the flash of excitement I smother in the name of being professional. “That’s great to hear! We can get it on the calendar as soon as we’re home. If everyone’s on board, I can probably get the first one set up within the first month of the semester.”
“I knew you’d jump right on it,” Andrea says, clapping her hands together.
“She is shockingly efficient, isn’t she?” Dr. Guarino says, his tone dry, but there’s a sparkle in his eye I’ve only seen directed at his students.
I smirk back at him. “I’m endlessly disappointing to you, aren’t I?”
He laughs, his whole body shaking like a little Italian Santa Claus. My heart soars at being a part of this little family. Of them seeing my value and welcoming me.Celebratingme.
The dinner passes without anything of note, us eventually ushering the students out of the tables so the restaurant can clean up. There are tears and hugs and a million pictures as the students desperately try to capture everything.
Once the students wander off, I turn to Inez. “We headed home?”
She chews on her lip. “I… I’m going to meet Tomasso for a drink. There are some things we need to talk about. I’m going to tell him about the job offer.” She drops her voice to a whisper on the last words, shooting a nervous glance to where the professors stand a few feet away.
“Oh, wow,” I say. “That’s big.”
She hums, towing me further away. “We've been casual since I’ve always planned on leaving, but if I’m staying? An hour-and-a-half train ride is way different than a nine-hour plane trip. I don’t know...”
Tomasso’s a great guy. He would treat her the way she’s always deserved to be treated, but can she really know him well enough after only two months to make that call?
“Are you sure?” I ask, unable to stop myself. “That’s a big move for a man.”
Inez meets my eyes, her own steely in their determination. “He’s not why I’m taking it.”
And like a wave crashing over me, I finally realize that all my resolve to show her Billings is still the place for her was completely misplaced. This job is what she wants. Not to get away from the toxicity of our school or to be close to Tomasso, but for herself. I spent the summer obsessed with winning and keeping her, but I never stopped to consider if she wanted to be won over to begin with.
A breath whooshes out of me, and when I smile, it’s genuine. She’ll be incredible in this role, all crisis management, and what more can I ask for my best friend than for her to be happy and fulfilled? Her smile back’s massive and tinged with the smallest bit of relief.
I raise an eyebrow. “Okay, but Tomasso’s a pretty big pro, isn’t he?”
Inez giggles, chewing on her bottom lip. “I think I love him, Quinn.”
She’s always been a hopeless romantic, but she isn’t one to throw the wordlovearound. I can see her future with him. Starting long distance, then she’ll transfer to the Roman branch of Leonardo da Vinci. Them having a half-dozen kids running around when Colton and I visit over the summer. The idea of her leaving Boston still breaks my heart, but I’d never want her to sacrifice her own happiness for mine.
I wrap her in my arms, resting my chin on her shoulder. “I could not have parted with you, my Nezzie, to anyone less worthy.”
