Marion’s father gripped her hand, and together they listened.
I owe Marcus Hart my life, and I have tried to live in a way that hewould approve of, though he never asked for anything. When last we spoke, he asked if I could find his daughter a good place to live. I suggested the same apartment building where Hank was living with his lovely wife, and where I later sent my daughter, Susan. It fills my heart to know our two daughters are now close friends.
To everyone in this room, again, I apologize. I lived a lie, and I pulled you all into it. I hope you will someday find it in your hearts to forgive me.
As far as my will, Mr. Godfrey will tell you that I am bequesting generous sums to the Canadian Legion and the Canadian Red Cross. Mr. Godfrey is in possession of a cheque for Hank Moore. It is a hollow apology for letting him live in the dark for so long.
The rest is as follows:
I apologize to my partner in business, Tom Duncan, for allowing you to believe you worked with a war hero. You have more business acumen than I ever had, and I am proud to leave the business to you. I wish you great success.
For my son, Joey. I’m tortured by the thought that you went to war because of me. That you saw me as some kind of hero and decided you should aim for that as well. If that is why you went, I pray to God you someday understand that you were so much more courageous than I. When you come home, you will have half of my wealth to do with as you please. I know you will do something good with it, because you have a heart of gold.
Lastly, I ask forgiveness of my remarkable daughter, Susan. In the past year or so, and increasingly so after her brother’s decision to go to Vietnam, I have become selfish. I chose my own misery over her happiness, and I regret that deeply. To you, my wonderful, spirited, talented Sassy, I bestow all the rest, including the house, knowing that all you ever really wanted was my time. I hope you will use this money to make yourself happy, and I hope that means you will play your guitar and sing like a nightingale for the rest of your days.
twenty-sevenSASSY
Everything Sassy had believed about her life was a lie.
Oh, there was so much she needed to talk with Joey about, but even if she could manage to get her thoughts onto paper, where would she send a letter? There had been no news of him. Deep down, Sassy knew the silence didn’t mean much. The entire country was in flames, and with the Vietcong descending on U.S. bases and South Vietnamese villages, word about one specific soldier wasn’t going to arrive quickly.
She refused to accept the possibility that Joey had been killed. That was unthinkable. Joey was just missing. He would be found. Sheneededhim to be found.
She couldn’t tell Joey anything. Not yet.
And now she couldn’t talk with Marion, either.
After the reading of the will, Marion stayed with her father. Tom drove Sassy back to the apartment building, and neither of them had spoken throughout the drive. She imagined Tom was as confused as she was. When they got to 105 Isabella, she asked him to come inside; she couldn’t bear to be alone. He followed her into the elevator and stood silently at her side as they rode to the fifth floor. In her apartment, she went, out of habit, to make tea, and he walked around the living room, studying her paintings.When she brought out the tea, he was gazing through the balcony door.
She placed the tray on the coffee table then sat. She’d brought a few cookies as well, but she didn’t imagine either of them had much of an appetite. Still saying nothing, Tom joined her on the red couch.
“I miss him so much,” she said quietly, starting the conversation. “I want to go see him or have lunch with him at the office like we used to. I want to hug him, and I want to help him stop drinking, but I’ll never get a chance to do any of that.”
Tom kept his eyes on the table in front of them and said nothing. That was all right. She didn’t really want to hear anything.
“I don’t have my mom, I don’t have Joey, and now I don’t have my dad. It’s just me, and I’m not ready for that.” She faced him, studying his profile. “It’s not fair.”
Now she wanted him to talk.
“You’re right. It’s not.” He sipped his tea. “Sassy, this might not be what you want to hear, but I’m kind of pragmatic when it comes to things like this. I lost my parents years ago, and I remember how scary that felt. Like I was floundering without a life preserver. But Sassy, you are your own person. You always have been. You’re strong and independent, and that’s not going to stop. So the way I look at it, technically you don’t need them. You can stand on your own. Youwantthem, but you’re in control of yourself, so it’s not a need.”
“Feels like it,” she sniffed.
“Of course it does.” He placed a comforting hand on her back, giving her exactly the amount of connection she needed in that moment. “I’m sorry you’re hurting, Sass. If I could do anything in the world to help you, I would.”
He was such a good man. She didn’t deserve him.
“He called me Sassy,” she said.
“What?”
“In the will. That was the only time he ever called me Sassy.” She exhaled. “Today messed everything up in my head. I’m so confused.”
She leaned back in the couch and stared up at the ceiling. She needed to get her thoughts in order. Right now, none of them were lining up.
She rolled her head toward him. “Are you angry? You know what I mean. About today.”
He thought about it. “Not angry. Surprised, yes. Not angry.”
