“Our rent’s going up,” Jean said.
This was also news to Libby. “Uh, since when?”
“Today. I saw Mr. Akina by the mailboxes. He needs to fix the roof, so.” She pointed a finger upward.
“Dang,” Keoki said. “That’s rough.”
“Why didn’t you tell me?” Libby shoved the back of her roommate’s seat. “We can’t afford mini-quiches!”
“It’s like a last hurrah. At least we can eat something good while we’re looking for jobs. And probably a new place to live. Unless somebody wanted togiveus something tasty. So we don’t starve to death. On the streets. Like trash pandas. Who also have rabies.”
“Okay.” Keoki sighed, defeated. “You can have profiteroles.”
“Can I also have some of your water?” Jean was already tipping the insulated bottle to her lips.
He held out his hand to make sure she didn’t drink it all.
“Do you know about peecycling?” Jean asked when he had a mouthful of water.
Keoki choked. Liquid sloshed down the front of his shirt as he slammed the bottle back in the cup holder. “Why?”
“Because of the fertilizer shortage, people are collecting their piss and pouring it on fields. It has all the right nutrients.”
“No,” Keoki said. Libby understood that he meant it as a blanket denial:No, we’re not doing that. No, I don’t want to hear more about it.
“I’m not sayingweshould pee in jugs.” Jean shook Keoki’s water bottle as a visual aid. “It’s for Lillibet. Doesn’t that seem like something she’d get into? My body, my garden, I’m so green, la la la.”
Libby needed to nip this in the bud. “I don’t think urine fits Lillibet’s brand.”
“That’s the genius of it.” Jean twisted sideways, going into full sales mode. “We keep pushing the line farther out there until people are, like,I guess it’s time to shove this polished rock up my vajayjay and call it self-care.Aren’t you curious to see how far we can go?”
“Not in a gynecological direction.” Libby paused. It was like wording wishes with a genie; you had to cut off all the loopholes. “Or anything pee-related.”
“And no poop,” Keoki added.
“You don’t understand what it means to be avant-garde,” Jean complained. “We’re doing something punk rock. In your face.”
“That’s not actually what avant-garde means.” Keoki had picked up a smattering of French phrases from his job at a fancy bistro in Waikiki, always delivered with zero attempt at an accent in his impossibly deep voice.Beurre blanc. Croque monsieur. Amuse-bouche.It sounded like he was talking about car parts. “And please don’t mention your lady parts in front of my grandmother.”
“Better get used to it, daddy-o. A couple months from now you’re going to be pulling a slimy baby out of Cici’s hoohah. It’s going to be vagina this, vagina that, all the livelong day.”
Keoki shook his head, but he couldn’t suppress a smile. To say that he was excited about being a father was like calling the waves at Pounders a little rough. Five minutes after his girlfriend Cici found out she was pregnant, Keoki signed up for a class on prenatal massage and started researching car seats. He’d always given off major dad vibes, but until now it had largely been directed at keeping Libby and Jean out of trouble.
Libby figured she had a few more months to stamp out the tiny part of her that worried they were going to lose him completely to his new life. People grew up and had families. It was healthy and normal! Unless their development was stunted, and they wound up living like college students forever.
“I likehoohah.” Keoki’s deep voice made it sound like a cheer. “Think I can say that at Lamaze?”
“I will pay you money if you do.”
“You have money? Thought you two lolos were broke.” Keoki rubbed his fingers together. “Show me.”
“She might have money later,” Libby told him.
“Why are you both so literal?” Jean faced the window, as if she couldn’t bear to look at their annoying faces. “I’m surrounded by doubters.”
Gravel crunched under the tires as they turned onto Tutu Lua’s driveway. The house in which Libby had spent a sizable chunk of her childhood was solid and square. Whitewashed cement block walls surrounded the lanai, where a rotating array of half-wild cats could be found napping in patches of sun. Tutu Lua relied on them to keep the rodents away from her prize mango tree.
Before they’d taken more than a handful of steps, the screen door slammed.
