When was the last time I ate?
Last night, my brain supplies, though chewing ice cubes between drinks hardly counts.
I drag myself upright, groaning at the pain radiating down my shoulders. Seven days of walking around wound up tighter than a tripwire will do that to a man. I run a heavy hand down my face, wiping off the exhaustion.
Not that it helps. Nothing will pull me back to myself until Leilani’s away from Jax. Away from his reach. Safe... withme.
That thought shouldn’t materialize. I’ve no right to it, but it’s already burrowed into me, spreading like poison.
I don’t know if my worry’s justified, but that doesn’t mean shit. She turned me into a walking disaster the moment she enteredScarlett.
I tell myself she isn’t mine, that I don’t own her, but every beat of my pulse argues back, dragging her face into focus until I can’t breathe.
Last night should’ve drained me. Those adrenaline spikes on top of all that alcohol should’ve knocked me out cold for twelve hours and forced my system to reset, but no.
No matter how much I drank, how high I felt when Vaughn pulled the trigger, my mind stayed trapped, stuckonLeilani.
Is Jax hurting her? Threatening her? Blackmailing her?
I swing my legs over the edge of the bed and force my morning routine into motion: painkillers, shower, clothes, a bottle of water, three shots of espresso.
Ryder promised he’d find out what he could about Leilani, but given the state of his girl when Vaughn—
Shit!
They’rehere, aren’t they? In my guest bedroom. I gave him the keys last night so he could get Bianca away from his blood-spattered home and calm her down. I doubt they’ll be leaving anytime soon, or that Ryder will have time or headspace for research after his woman got put through hell. She’s his priority.
Too bad I don’t have the patience to sit on my ass and wait.
I scroll through my contacts, thumb hovering over the names of low-ranking soldiers who won’t immediately run their mouths off to Carter. My fingers hesitate, the phone growing heavy.
This is a big fucking no-no. I don’t have the authority to make this move. One text will cross an uncrossable line.
Don’t do it.
It’s just one order.
But even one order carries weight. I know the rules. I know this power isn’t mine to wield. No one moves without Carter’s approval... yet here I am, seconds away from tossing that rule straight in the trash.
You can’t issue orders—
A vision of her eyes cuts off the warning in my head. I type outFind out where Jax is stayingwith shaking fingers and let it fly.
The next few hours stretch into endless torture. Time crawls, every tick of the clock reverberating like a church bell. I pace my living room, then the hall, then back again. I roll my shoulders, pop my knuckles, down five espressos.
Nothing takes the edge off.
I tell myself I’m waiting for my overnight guests to wake up, but every second without that address scrapes my nerves against bone. My mind won’t stop circling, replaying my every interaction with Leilani, every second she spent by Jax’s side, the way she looked so helpless, even when her eyes burned.
What if I imagined it?
What if she’s fine?
What if she wants him?
No. No fucking way. I know what a cage looks like and she’s inside one, even if no one else sees the bars.
It’s past three in the afternoon when the door down the hall creaks open, followed by the tap, tap, tap of bare feet against the hardwood floor.
