Despite its size, Koby’s place is suffocating. Even though I’m not a prisoner here. The doors aren’t locked, there are no cameras watching my every move. I can leave whenever I want.
And yet, I still feel trapped.
Or maybeisolatedfits better.
Koby leaves early in the morning and comes back late at night, so I’m constantly alone with my thoughts. He offered to invite the girls over, but I don’t think it’s a good idea. Not yet, not while I’m so unpredictable, snapping at the smallest triggers. Especially when Koby says something that rings dangerously close to Anton’s words.
The FaceTime call was postponed, but it’s looming closer again, and knowing I’ll be facing him this Saturday doesn’t help. The closer it gets, the more restless I become. I can’t sit still. I’ve scrubbed the counters three times today. I washed a clean plateand rearranged the cutlery drawer, then put it back the way it was half an hour later.
I’vegrabbed my suitcase at least a dozen times over the past few days, ready to run, but I put it away every time. Deep down I know I’m safer here than anywhere else.
I just have to grit my teeth and stay put until Carter finalizes his plan. Once the Grey brothers disappear, I’ll be free to leave. Free to choose a new life.
Koby promised Anton won’t get his hands on me again. That I won’t end up under lock and key, stripped of my choices and autonomy.
I believe him.
Itrusthim more than anyone else in my life. More than Carter whom I’ve known for years.
Koby’s earned my trust through small, powerful gestures. He leaves the front door key exactly where we agreed. He gives me space when I need it, and watches his words, stepping around any he knows would ignite my fuse.
He’s learning the hard way which to avoid.
He’s sweet, considerate, and it stokes the guilt swirling inside me whenever I lash out.
I can’t control it, but I hate the moment I snap out of it and find new bruises and scratches marking his skin.
It was different with Octavius, Blaze, and Jax. I didn’t care what I did to them. I wanted to hurt them. I meant every scratch, every punch, and didn’t feel bad.
It’s different with Koby. I hate hurting him... and I hate that he sees me when I’m so unstable.
The bruise on his jaw from when I clocked him on Carter’s driveway is still healing, a shadow now, but it draws my attention when he talks. It makes my stomach twist, a constant reminder of my insanity.
I haven’t lost it quite as badly since, but I’ve broken a few things around the house in hissy fits, and I’m not sure whether I love or hate how Koby reacts to my outbursts. There’s no anger, no disappointment.
He looks at me with burning hunger.
I think my violence turns him on.
Whenever I snap, his eyes come alive, jaw clenches, hands ball into fists like he’s doing his best to hold back but secretly wants to pin me to the floor and fuck me senseless.
I wish he would...
I wish he’d show me what’s hiding behind his restraint. I want his weight pressing into mine. His breath hot against my neck, his big hands rough where I need them most.
At first, I thought the butterflies flapping around in my stomach whenever he’s near were adrenaline. Leftover survival instincts confusing attraction with proximity.
But it’s not that. It’s him. His scent, his body, the way his voice heats my blood and makes my thighs clench. I can’t be in the same room with him without imagining his weight pressing me into the mattress, his mouth on mine, his cock inside me, fucking me until I forget the world.
“What are you thinking so hard about?” Koby asks, looking over his shoulder across the kitchen.
He’s making himself a snack, even though I made him breakfast less than an hour ago. The man is a walking furnace, always hungry. It’s absurd that he looks the way he does, muscles on top of muscles, lethal lines, and broad shoulders, while stuffing food into his mouth at every opportunity.
I finish my coffee, setting the cup aside. “That I’m not far off exploding,” I admit, dropping my face into my hands. “How much longer before Carter deals with Octavius?”
“A while.” There’s a pause. “You’ve been here five days, hellcat, and you’realreadyrunning out of patience?” A stoolscrapes along the tile. I don’t lift my head, but I feel Koby move closer as he sits down. “These things take time. He wants a solid plan before we make a move.”
“Didn’t you say he stormed Noretto’s estate without a plan when Hailey was there?”
