“Yes, I do blame you,” Eugene argued.“When I say that I’m here because I have to be, that should be enough.There was no need for you to race on up just to make sure I was working.”
“I raced on up because I missed you.It’s been three weeks.”
“It’s often been three weeks.”
“But it shouldn’t be.It doesn’t have to be.I need you there.”
“You nag me there.You’ve got me dressed up and going out every night to some party or ball or art show.”
“They’re important.”
“They’re boring.”
“Those parties and balls and exhibits are where you can make contacts to broaden your base.That’s what you should be doing.”
Pam heard the tension in her father’s voice as he said, “My business is taking tourmaline from the earth and selling it, and I’m doin’ pretty damn well.”
“But you could be doing better.Don’t you see?You’re not making the most of your assets.You sell the stones, pay your crew, buy new equipment now and then, and put the rest of the money into the bank.It’s piling up there, Gene, when it should be earning twice as much in another venture.”
“This sounds familiar.Have you been talking to John?”
Pam flattened her back against the wall.She knew the answer to that one.She saw the way Patricia had begunto wait for John to come home from work.She heard the discussions they often had over drinks before dinner.
“Who else do I have to talk with?”Patricia shot back.“You’re never around.”
“Why do you have to talk with anyone?Why can’t you just trust me?”
“Idotrust you, but I get nervous.We have all our eggs in one basket.What if something should happen up here?What if the mine caves in or there’s a flood, or you take the last piece of tourmaline out of the ground and can’t find any more?What will you do then?”
“If that happens,” Eugene said with renewed patience, “which it won’t, but if it does, I’ll know that I’ve got all this wonderful money in the bank that I can use to keep from starving.”
Pam pictured him grinning that broad, self-confident grin of his.Leaning against the wall, she smiled.But her smile soon faded, because Patricia wasn’t as easily reassured.
“But why not invest it and make even more money?Why not diversify?If you branch into another field, you can be in Boston more.I need you there, Gene.When I’m alone, I start imagining things.I get very nervous.”She was speaking more quickly.Even from the distance, Pam could hear the tremor in her voice.
Eugene must have heard it too and been touched.“Now, now, Patsy …” He went on, but his voice faded to a gentle murmur, too low for Pam to hear at the top of the stairs.
Telling herself that things were in hand now that her father knew her mother’s fears, Pam went to bed.She heard no more voices, and if her parents slept together inthe large master suite, she was asleep before they climbed the stairs.
She and Patricia stayed the weekend, and by the time they headed back to Boston on Sunday afternoon, Pam felt optimistic that her parents’ differences had been ironed out.“You’ll be down to see us soon?”she asked after giving Eugene a last hug and kiss.
“Soon, Pammy girl.Real soon.”
He kept his word.He was back in Boston the following week, but it was for a single night.Then he was gone.Patricia was more disappointed than usual and therefore more nervous.That added to Pam’s disappointment, because when Patricia was nervous, she turned to John.
He was, without doubt, Pam decided, one of the coolest people she’d ever known.His hair was always combed, his tie always straight, his posture just so, with one hand in a pocket so that he’d look casual even if he felt tense.
She could forgive him that, she supposed.What she couldn’t forgive was that he always seemed to know how to put Patricia’s mind at ease, which wasn’t right at all.That was Eugene’s job.
But Eugene wasn’t there, and the more John filled the gap, the more Patricia sought him out.
Pam didn’t know what to do.Each time she talked with her father, she begged him to come home, but he always had an excuse.Then vacation came, and she went to Timiny Cove.Patricia joined them for several days, driving up with John when Eugene demanded he come.But when John returned to Boston, so did Patricia.
Watching her leave, Pam felt a sense of loss.She wasn’t as close to her mother as she used to be.They didn’t talkmuch.They didn’t laugh together or daydream together or spend days together, just the two of them, the way they once did.Patricia seemed distanced from her, even when they were in the same room.She watched her mother drive away from her and she knew their relationship had changed.
Unable to blame Eugene, whom she adored, or Patricia, who seemed too distracted, Pam put the responsibility on John.
Chapter 4
