“Not that I know of.” He took a drink of his coffee as if he needed to get his thoughts together. “The closest one I had was a foster brother. Christopher. For six months, he was like my big brother before his social worker showed up and told us he was going home.” He paused and looked out over the park. “I cried like a baby. I wanted to go with him, but CPS would never allow it. I didn’t understand it at the time. I just knew I was losing the only person who ever felt like family.” He stopped again to wipe away a tear. “The day he left, he handed me his favorite T-shirt. I used it to cover my pillow every night. To this day, I swear it still smells like him.”
“Was that the same place that…”
Luca knew what I was asking. “Yes.”
“I’m sorry you lost him,” I whispered.
He sniffed and wiped at his eyes with the back of his hand. “Me too. Maybe things would have been different.”
I was overcome with emotions I had no experience dealing with. There were so many things that threatened to fall from my mouth. Promises I shouldn’t make to him. But my rational brain wasn’t in control. My emotionally charged one was. I reached for his hand and brought it up to my mouth, and kissed the top of his. Luca gasped at the feel of my lips on his skin. “No one will ever hurt you again. I promise.”
His eyes filled again, and his smile didn’t reach his eyes. “You can’t promise that, Axel.”
He was wrong. “Yes, I can.” Panic began to rise. He was telling me goodbye before we even got to start. And I wanted to start.
“You can’t, sweet…” He closed his eyes and shook his head. The pain on his face mirrored mine as he glanced at the ground before looking back at me. I held my breath. “Your life is about to go in a different direction, Axel. New team, new season, new friends.” He hesitated, then whispered, “New lovers. You’re going to be busy with your NHL life, just like you’re meant to be. And I’ll go back to mine, grateful that I knew you.”
That wasn’t going to work. For the first time in a long time, my heart felt like it was going to leave my chest. I was losing him before I ever had him. Taking his cup from his hands, I threw them both in the nearest trash can. I was going to need my hands for this.
Stepping closer, so close I could feel his breath rush in and out, see the fear in his eyes, and smell my bodywash on his skin. I’d never wanted someone so much in my life, even if it scared me. Losing him terrified me more.
Brushing the wisps of hair from his face, like I’d craved to do since the moment I met him, I lightly ran my fingers through his hair. Luca’s eyes darted frantically over mine, searching forsomething, anything. “You’re the most beautiful person I’ve ever met, inside and out.”
Leaning in, I kissed his eyelids, making his breath stop. Forehead to forehead, I breathed in the closeness. I waited for him to touch me, wanted to demand he put his hands on me, but that would be wrong. He needed to make that decision on his own. Trembling hands landed on my waist, then bunched my shirt in his fists. A gentle tug forward told me all I needed to know. He wanted me as much as I wanted him. “Luca,” I breathed close to his lips. “I need you. I won’t allow you to walk away from me now that you’ve cracked open my armor. I want to try to be who you need.’
“Axel,” he pleaded, his warm breath skating over my skin. I couldn’t decide if he wanted me to stop or go on. So… I went on.
“Don’t say no. Just listen. I’m going to ramble here, but I need you to hear me out. It’s crazy and terrifying, really.” I pulled back and looked into his eyes. “I don’t know how to do more. But I want to try to be the person you need. Losing you means losing the best person I’ve ever known. I’m not a good man like you, but I’d like to try to become a better one. For you. Only you.”
With his eyes boring into mine, he whispered, “Kiss me.”
He didn’t have to ask me twice. All of Brooklyn and the world slipped away when our lips met. A soft whimper escaped from him, stroking my desire. He pulled me closer, twisting his hand in my shirt, and making me want more of him. We needed to slow down, but I didn’t know how. One thing should lead to another, until I buried myself inside him. But this was Luca, and he was everything. He was the person I never thought I’d want. And before I ruined it all, I forced myself to pull away. I licked across his lips, then kissed down his neck before whispering in his ear. “You are mine.” I took the shiver that ran through his body as a good sign.
“Please don’t break me, Axel.”
“Never,” I whispered, and kissed him again.
The following morning, I sat in the conference room at Sutton and McClain, ready to meet with my investment team. “Update me on where we are in the acquisition.”
My US financial advisor, Harlan Sutton, sat across from me with a stack of papers. He flipped through them until he came to the one he was looking for. “As of last week, you own thirty-six percent of the outstanding stock held by non-family members.”
“Where does that leave us?”
“You are the largest single stockholder right now. To control the board, you need to own forty-six percent.”
“Can I get eleven percent, or do I need more?” He flipped through to another paper in his stack. I waited for the final number. “We’re still working on the last two purchases. With those two and what you already have, you’ll hold fifty-one percent.”
I narrowed my eyes. “How much do they still have?”
My father’s former business colleague sat back in his seat. He looked older than the last time I met with him, even though he was my father’s age. He was making a small fortune in fees that, if he were like my father, would be all he cared about. “Everything is the same. Melinda still holds twenty-five percent. Madison and Makenna hold five percent each.”
“And Davis?” I refused to call him my father out loud. “How much does he hold?”
Harlan reconfirmed what I already knew. “Ten percent.”
Perfect. “Make the purchases. Like I said, the cost is not an issue.”
As I stood, Harlan looked concerned. He walked over and stood beside me. “I know you’re hurting, Axel. It was a terrible thing they did to you and Mason. You can rest assured that you have my loyalty. I’ll let you know when it’s done.”
