“No.”
His eyes widened as if he’d never been told no before. “Axel! You can’t do this!”
I leaned forward and tried to dial back my urge to control the situation. “Luca, it’s too bloody hot in this city to be without proper air conditioning. I’d replace the damn thing if you’d let me.” Luca’s eyes widened, and I held up my hand to stop him. “But I won’t. You seem to love that relic. And as far as the car service, that’s a result of your repairs. If I had a car, I’d drive you myself.”
Luca cocked his head to the side. I could see the panic rising in his eyes. He carded his fingers through his hair and looked away. “I don’t get you.”
I got up and went to sit beside him. “Most don’t. But we’re not talking about me.” He collapsed back against the cushions and rubbed his hands over his face. I sat back. “I know I can be a lot. But why can’t you just be a good boy and let me help?”
He sat up, indignant. “I’m no one’sgood boy.If that’s what you’re looking for, you’re looking at the wrong person.”
I locked eyes with him. “I’m not asking you to be my boyfriend. I don’t do relationships. And I can find a fuck anywhere I want it.”
“Good to know,” he muttered. “You still haven’t answered my question. Why are you doing all of this?”
God, was I going to say this out loud?“I have people in my life, family even. Yet I’m no one’s person, or their emergency contact. Not my mother in London, or my brother. No one truly needs me in my world or would miss me if I weren’t there. The only thing that separates your world from mine is dollar signs. I am as alone in this life as you are.” I laced my hands together and studied the design on the floor.
“Axel,” he called.
“I’m not trying to buy your friendship or your companionship. It’s just that…” Rubbing at the sudden ache in my chest, I searched for the right word to explain my existence. “…I’m alone most of the time. After every game, every holiday, every day. I enjoy my time with you. My money means nothing to me. I’d give it all away if it meant I could feel something other than anger.” I looked at him. “But when I’m with you, I forget about all of that. You give me a reprieve from myself and make me see things differently. That’s a gift you don’t realize you give. So the prospect of helping you gives me a purpose greater than hockey.”
As if I needed to drive the point home, I stretched my arms out at the immense space meant for more than one solitary person. “Look at this place. They don’t know me. No one does. Growing up in foster care isn’t the only way to be abandoned.”
His eyes changed the moment understanding set in. A spark of recognition or camaraderie filled his eyes as his shoulders relaxed. “I want to know you. Nothing comes free in this life, Axel. Everything comes with a cost, whether it’s money or self-worth. Powerful people take advantage of the weak, and I refuse to be exploited.”
The need to keep him safe deepened even more. “I’m not one of those people. I have the means to make your life easier, and it comes with the most sincere intentions. It makes me happy to help you. For me. Not just you.”
Just when I thought he was going to agree, I opened my mouth and said the wrong thing. “I want to find you a better place to live while we find mine.”
Luca’s jaws clenched. His irritation rose like the tide, and I waited to be swept away. “My apartment may not meet your standards, but it’s mine, and no one can take it away from me. It’s not great, but it’s not the worst place I’ve had to live.”
We were back to step one. So I held up my hand in surrender, but I never gave up this easily. “Calm down. No one’s taking your home. But I will say this. You’re an anomaly, Luca Vaughn. I’ve never met anyone like you. Why are you so stubborn?”
“Why are you so fucking pushy?”
“I’m a hockey player. That’s what we do.”
He narrowed his eyes. “It’s more than hockey, Axel. And we both know it.”
The doorbell rang, calling an end to this round of our standoff. “We can continue this later. But that’s dinner. I hope you’re hungry.”
“I can always eat,” he breathed.
That was another thing we’d address. But not now. Standing, I strode to the door and opened it as the delivery person appeared with several bags. “Delivery for Mr. Hughes.”
Reaching for the bags, I turned as Luca walked up. “Thank you. Hold on a minute.” Handing them to Luca, he took the food and headed to the kitchen. I opened my wallet and pulled out a tip. “Here you go.”
“Thank you, sir,” he said, taking the money.
Securing the lock, I found Luca in the kitchen unbagging all the things I’d ordered. When he looked up, I was happy to see the earlier irritation had slipped away. Maybe he was beginning to understand me. “Is all of this for the two of us?”
The two of us.I liked the way that sounded. “Yes. Hope you like Chinese. I wanted to make sure we had a variety to choose from.”
“I love it, but I don’t get it very often. I’m more of a ramen noodle guy.”
I wrinkled my nose. “That’s not really Chinese.”
“No. But it fits the budget and fills the stomach. And it’s quick and tasty if you add some of this stuff.” He picked up the packets of sauce.
