My phone vibrated in my hand with an incoming text. Holding it up, I smiled through damp eyes as I read his name.
Colin: Through TSA.
Me: Good.
Colin: Are you okay?
Me: Fuck no. Are you?
Colin: No. Not at all.
Colin: But I’m an expert at hiding my feelings. Or I was. Until you.
My chest squeezed at his words. I never wanted him to hide anything from me.
Me: I’m glad I could change that for you.
Colin: Me too, love.
This was excruciating. Why the fuck couldn’t things go our way?
Me: I’m staying here until your plane leaves.
Colin: You don’t have to do that.
Colin: You should go home and sleep.
Tears welled in my eyes.
Me: What’s the use? You’re not there.
I swallowed down the emotion, trying to convince myself this was only temporary. But my heart didn’t know the difference between two minutes and two weeks. All it wanted was him.
Me: I know it’s silly.
Colin: Not silly at all. I understand completely.
I knew he did. Neither of us slept last night, and until the exhaustion forced me to sleep, I’d fill my waking hours trying to find out what the problem was. Jonah was probably going to wish he’d never taken us on as a client.
We texted until it was time for him to board. When he sent the final text that he had to turn off his phone, his leaving came crashing down on me again.
Me: I love you so much.
Colin: I love you too. I’ll text when I’m in LA. Got a while there before I board my flight to Sydney.
I shook my head, but didn’t reply. I pulled open the flight tracker app, then set up the notifications for both his flights. Stuffing my phone in my pocket, I took a deep breath and headed for the parking lot.
I’d never felt so empty in my life. My chest hurt, and breathing wasn’t going well. When I got to the car at the end of the parking lot, I broke down and let it all out. I don’t know how long I sat there, sobbing over my steering wheel. But the notification of the flight taking off brought me back to reality.
It was time to head home to Bella and Allister.
I was lost in thought during the drive back to the house. How I got home, I wasn’t sure. These feelings were so overpowering that I didn’t know what to do with them. All of this was new, and I was completely out of my depth. I just had to feel it and own my pain, but also know in my heart he wasn’t gone forever.
When I pulled up at my house, a very familiar BMW sat in my driveway. I got out to meet my friend.
Rounding the front of my Rover, I’d never been happier to see a friendly face. “What are you doing here?”
“Thought I’d come check on you,” Evan said. “I knew today was going to be rough.”
