My chest ached after touching him. I’d become an expert at his facial expressions after two weeks. Sometimes he showed me the man I met at the airport, and other times the man who had rocked my world. Either way, I couldn’t have him, so all I was left to do was go back to sleep and have him in my dreams.
Chapter 13
Carson
Somehow, we made it through training camp without killing each other. True to his word, he played well and made no more major mistakes on the field. But I was going to lose my mind if he didn’t keep the goddamn helmet on his head. I’d bitched and moaned so much I felt like his mother. And that dredged up so many questions I wanted to ask.
Colin wasted no time making friends with some of our teammates and made plans to go out when we returned to San Diego. One of the rookies, Lucas Lundgren, had become one of Colin’s fans.
Like Colin, he wasn’t from the States. With that in common, it gave them something to bond over. All we had was intense sexual chemistry and proximity. And now football. But staying away from him was like asking a cat not to scratch. It was impossible.
The way Lucas gawked at Colin grated on me. Objectively speaking, his blond hair and blue eyes made him attractive. He was a good kid, twenty-two, and trying to become our punter. Since Colin’s position as a fullback also involved a lot of kicking, the two had become fast friends. And I wanted to punch both of them after I did a little digging and found out he was bisexual.
To make matters worse, I got a front-row seat to their budding friendship. Colin had no issue hooking up, and if that’s what he wanted, there was nothing I could do.
We’d just reached our cruising altitude when Colin’s phone pinged with a text. He leaned over, pressing his shoulder into mine, to pull it out of his back pocket.
“Excuse me. Sorry about that.”
No he wasn’t.
His screen lit up with another notification as he replied.
From my periphery, I could see the smile form on his face as he interacted with someone other than me.
I drank my water as he laughed and texted away, trying to ignore what he was doing. Finally needing a reprieve, I leaned my head back and closed my eyes, hoping sleep would come soon. Exhausted from two weeks of intense workouts and sleepless nights watching Colin in the other bed, I needed to think about something other than him.
When the plane landed, we taxied to the terminal and waited to deplane. That was when he decided to share his plans.
“I’m going to go have a beer with Lucas. So I won’t need a ride home.”
My gut churned as I stared and imagined him and the punter. As far as I knew, Colin hadn’t hooked up with anyone in Arizona, but I couldn’t be positive. There were times when we weren’t together, and I knew he had gay dating apps on his phone. But he wasn’t mine. I’d made sure of that.
Nodding, I bit back a smartass reply. “Yeah. Okay. Have fun. I’m sure Allister will be fine for a few more hours.”
I was an asshole, and I knew it. Being passive-aggressive wasn’t like me, but I couldn’t help myself sometimes.
“I’ll go check on him for you. Have a good time.”
Colin stared at me for a moment, then nodded. “Yeah, thanks, mate. I’d appreciate that. If I don’t see you tonight, I’ll see you tomorrow.”
The only thing I could think of was, would he sleep with him?
He craned his neck toward the front, where Lucas sat a few rows ahead of us. I waited to exit the row, making a pretense of finding my earbuds. I had them, just didn’t want to watch him leave with someone else.
When I got the luggage out on the tarmac, Lennox was waiting for his bags. He’d told me over dinner one night that he was dating his best friend from childhood, Lieutenant Dane Calloway. He was an F/A-18 fighter pilot stationed in San Diego. He’d reconnected with him when he went to volunteer at the Youth Center and met Dane’s son. I knew he probably had plans, but it was worth a shot.
“What are you doing tonight?”
Lennox grinned at me. “I’ve got a date. What about you?”
I shook my head. “Nothing. I’m going home, gonna get in my hot tub, and forget about football.”
Lennox raised a brow like I’d forgotten something. But I hadn’t. “And forget about him. He’s driving me crazy.”
I let him think it was about football when all I wanted to do was get him back in my bed. For two weeks, I’d studied him, watched him move like a panther, and turn into a potential NFL star, knowing I couldn’t have him. It was fucking torture.
“Well,” Lennox said, grabbing his bag, “enjoy your night of solitude without your new roommate.”
