“Not from me!” I was gonna lose my shit here in the foyer, and I sure didn’t need the neighbors calling the cops. Although that might get his attention at how serious this was.
“I fucking love you, you idiot. I’m aware that you have very little experience with unconditional love, but all I want from you is a chance to make this work. I can see and feel the way you feel about me every time I touch you, but goddamn it Brent, if someone were to hurt you because you didn’t tell me…”
I balled my fist and brought it to my mouth. Looking away, I had to get myself together before I went full Nicholas Sparks on his ass. He didn’t get it. But there was something else he might get.
I ran my fingers over his shoulder where his skeleton frog tattoo sat. I had one myself in memory of the teammates we’d lost.
“You and I have been in dangerous situations where we didn’t know if we’d come back home. It’s part of the job. And we know what it feels like to lose a teammate. But I’ve never experienced the fear of losing someone I love the way I love you.”
Brent cupped my face, but let me finish.
“This situation is not just about you,” I said. “This is also about me. It’s about all of us, but especially us as a couple. You cannot continue to push me away and expect me not to fight back, because I will do whatever it takes to prove myself to you.”
He hugged me tightly and kissed the side of my face before pulling away. “I hear what you’re saying, and I understand I probably should have let them know. But that fierce protector in you is also in me. If I could have taken that blast for Nate, I would have.”
I curled my lips in and let out a heavy sigh. While I understood where he was coming from, this was a completely different situation.
“John,” he said, cupping me around the neck. “I’m trying really hard not to fall in love with you. But I’m failing miserably.”
Lowering my forehead to his, I closed my eyes and allowed myself to relax for a minute. “Good to know.”
“And John, I’ll try not to shut you out, but it’s gonna take me some time. Not because I don’t want to trust you, but because I need to learn how again.”
I took his face in my hands and peered into his eyes. He showed me his sincerity and passion, and I could see my love reflected back at me. “I love you, and I need you to get used to hearing that.”
The look that came over his face alerted me that our serious conversation was over. “Are you one ofthoselovey-dovey people, John?”
I groaned and pulled him off the step. “Shut up. And yes, I am. So get the fuck used to it.”
“I can definitely get used to fucking.”
I ran my hand over my face and tried to hide my smile. “God, why do I like you so much?”
He laughed like a lunatic. “You don’tlikeme, John. Youloveme.”
“You’re an asshole,” I said, tugging him toward the exterior door to the building.
“Where are we going?”
“GQ asked me to check on the training facility, and we need to go now before things blow up.”
Brent stopped and looked at me. “What about the sauce?”
Fuck. He was right. “I’ll go put the meat away while you get the car. I’ll be right back.”
“Okay,” he said, turning for the parking lot.
Right as I reached the door to enter the building, my worst nightmare came to life before my eyes. Shots fired out, and I turned to see a car speeding down the street.
And Brent was on the ground in a pool of blood.
CHAPTER 22
BRENT
The distinct metallicsmell of blood and the sound of John’s panicked speech registered and broke through the unconscious state I was in. I could hear his fear in the panicked wordsemergencyandambulancecoming from him in a tone I’d never forget. It was the same tone GQ used when Nate was dying in his arms.
I felt his hands on my body as he kneeled to turn me over. My head ached, and blood ran down my face and into my eyes, leaving my vision skewed. I could feel the immediate throb of a headache.
