After saying goodbye to my parents, we made the ninety-minute drive back to the hotel. I held Nick’s hand in mine as we rode back into the city. All the Christmas lights and decorations reminded me we’d be spending our first Christmas together this year, and I needed to do some shopping.
When we got back to our room, Nick took off his jacket and boots, then crawled onto the bed.
“I’m so tired,” he mumbled around the pillow as his eyes drifted shut. “I’m just gonna rest my eyes before we go back out.”
“It’s fine, baby. I think I might just do the same.”
I took off my coat and boots and crawled on the bed next to him. My head hit the pillow, and the exhaustion of the day took over. Turning to my side, I put my arm over his back and just looked at him. Without opening his eyes, he turned to face me and held open his arm. I moved closer until I had him wrapped in my arms, chest to chest. He rested his forehead against my neck as I ran my hand through his hair. His warm breath came and went across my skin, his heart beating with mine.
My heart and mind were at peace when I was with him like this, breathing the same air, and as close as possible. I always wanted him, but right now, I needed to feel him like this.
I couldn’t remember a time I’d ever felt this way with someone. Not even with Victoria before she ripped my heart out. She tore my soul apart, and now Nick was mending it back together.
Nick was all I needed.
We didn’t make it to the wine bar I wanted to show him. It had started to snow again, so we opted to spend the rest of the evening in the room. I called the concierge and got a recommendation for ordering pizza. We couldn’t leave the city without Nick experiencing an authentic New York pie.
When the pizza arrived, we turned off all the lights and pulled back the draperies. We moved the chairs out of the way and spread out towels on the floor for our picnic. Sitting with our backs against the bed, we ate dinner as the warm light from the Christmas Tree provided an idyllic setting for our last night in snowy New York.
As our conversation drifted toward our romantic pasts, I knew that as much as I didn’t want to, we had to talk about it. Nick deserved to know.
“Why didn’t you tell your mom about us when you called?”
I looked at him as he took a swallow of his beer. Stalling, I took one of my own to brace myself for the story.
“I’ve had a few lovers in the past, both male and female, but I was only compelled to take two of them home to meet my family. It was the second—and last until you—that almost destroyed me.”
Nick looked at me with empathy in his eyes. “I’m sorry. I understand that situation very well.”
“You’ve had a bad relationship?”
He nodded slowly. “The relationship wasn’t bad at all. It was more that the circumstances that were heartbreaking because they were out of our control.”
Now he had me curious. “What happened?”
After finishing the last bite of pizza, he wiped his mouth and took a swallow of his beer.
“We met my freshman year in college. Evan was my roommate. We became friends instantly and did everything together the first year. We both were trying to survive college, and he was a tight end who was trying to become a starter. Our second year, we moved out of the dorms and into an apartment. One night we were goofing around after one of his games, playing someXbox, and he shoved me off the sofa. I reached up to grab onto something and got him. He landed on me, and as we laughed, something changed. It didn’t feel so much like friends anymore, and things progressed from there. We ended up in his bed, and we were inseparable from that point on until he transferred schools the next year.”
“Why did he transfer?”
Another swig of his beer, and he continued the story.
“He wanted to play in the NFL. He’s a tight end, like Greg Foster. Transferring to a Division I school would get him noticed by more scouts. Even his coach told him that. So he did what he had to do, and transferred. We stayed together as long as we could, but the distance wasn’t working. So we decided to break it off, and go back to being friends again.”
I put my arm around him and pulled him close. “I’m sorry, sweetheart. I know that had to hurt.”
“It did, but we’re both very driven. We stayed in touch for a while, but that just made it hurt worse. So we stopped calling and texting so we both could heal. He was as torn up about it as I was. Evan is a good man, and I’ll never hold it against him for doing what he had to in order to get what he wanted. He plays for Atlanta now.”
My heart hurt for him. “When’s the last time you talked to him?”
“The last time Atlanta played the Pirates. Two years ago, I think. But it’s okay. Seven years gives you time to heal and lots of perspective. Work can’t break your heart like that.”
It was ironic. I felt the same way.
“I get that. I threw myself into my restaurants after my relationship with Victoria ended. I needed to not think about it, so I worked night and day to make them the best I could.”
I stared, unblinking, at the Christmas Tree recalling all that shit for the first time in quite a while.
