She clasps her hands in front of her, her eyes pleading with me to understand and agree. In all the years of our friendship, Gwen has rarely asked me for anything. She’s been an incredible, loyal friend who would do anything for me. I can suck it up and do this one thing for her. “When is The Perry Wedding Two-Point-Oh?”
Her whole body slumps with relief, and the breath she releases blows the loose hairs away from my face. “It’s…um…it’s this Saturday.” She scrunches her face, her shoulders bunching up around her ears as if she’s bracing for impact.
I’m not sure whether to laugh or cry. Instead of doing either, I lift my glass and chug the rest of my wine. “Okay. I’ll be there.”
*****
I was sure it would be ages before I had another chance to wear my gorgeous sparkly teal dress. Despite loving it, part of me never wanted to evenseeit again since it was what I was wearing the night Jasper broke my heart. But here I am, just five weeks after Gwen and Evan’s wedding, wearing the dress and sporting similar hair and makeup as that night. The only difference from five weeks ago is that today I got ready in the back room of Cravings after working half a shift rather than at my apartment.
Marisol nearly pokes my eye out as she puts the finishing touch on my eyeliner. She’s been flitting around all evening like a bird in a too-small cage.
“Why areyouso nervous?” I ask as she gathers her makeup and shoves it haphazardly into its case, which is usually organized with fanatical precision.
“What? I’m not!” The words come out in a rush, sounding almost defensive. She freezes, blowing out a loud breath and jiggling her hands at her sides. “Gwen told me I could invite someone tonight if I wanted to since there’ll be fewer people than there were at the actual wedding, and I…I invited Carmen. And now I’m second-guessing that decision.”
“Carmen? I thought you two stopped seeing each other after your fourth date.”
“Wedid. It ended amicably, though—she’s looking for something serious and I’m not quite there, so we decided to end it before things went south. We ran into each other last week and went out for coffee, and then I called her last night and asked if she’d like to go to a faux wedding reception with me.”
“Wow. Well, good for you, Mar. I’m looking forward to meeting her.”
“See,that’swhy I’m second guessing this. I told her I wasn’t interested in anything serious and then I invite her to a wedding reception where literally all my friends will be. Doesn’t that send major mixed signals?”
Marisol is one of the most confident people I know, so seeing her doubting herself like this makes me feel as if I’ve entered some bizarre alternate universe. “If you really do just want to be friends with her, make sure to introduce her as a friend. Don’t leave room for ambiguity. Treat her like you’d treat me or any of your other friends—no kissing, no hand-holding…”
“No taking her back to my place and ripping her clothes off…”
I snort. “Right, none of that. Unless you decide youdowant to be more than friends with her.”
Marisol is silent, her mouth twisted to the side as she ponders. After a moment, she claps her hands and pulls me up from the desk. “You’d better get a move on, my lovely. I’ll see you in a bit.”
Talking to Marisol calmed my nerves somewhat, but as I wrap myself in the fancy faux-fur shawl she’s loaning me for the night—a concession to my winter jacket, which would squash my hair and dress—my stomach begins to roil with anxiety. The walk through the Village toward the event hall feels endless. The early evening air has a bite to it, and the frosty scent hanging in the atmosphere makes me think it’s going to snow later.
I’m shivering by the time I reach the events building. I dash inside, going straight for one of the heaters in the atrium and standing there until my body stops trembling and my hands have thawed. As I slip off the shawl, I realize how quiet and dark it is in here. Beyond the entrance hall, fairy lights seem to be the only thing illuminating the huge reception room. Gwen told me earlier today that since all the beautiful fall foliage is gone, she’s recreating the formal photos inside. The ten of us who were originally in the photos were asked to arrive an hour before the party. The eerie silence in here isnothelping my anxiety.
I get out my phone and turn on the flashlight app before stepping into the doorway of the event space. “Hello? Anyone here? I’m notthatearly, am I?”
The sudden flash of a spotlight turning on in the middle of the room makes me jump back. My fight or flight instinct kicks in, making me want to flee. I’ve just swiveled on my heel when I hear footsteps. I turn back as someone steps into the glow of the spotlight.
“Jasper?”
“Hello, Willow. It’s so good to see you.”
He’s wearing the same charcoal-gray suit he wore five weeks ago today. His hair is a little longer, the artfully-tousled waves begging to be touched.
I turn off the flashlight and stuff my phone in one of my dress pockets. “What’s going on? Where is everyone else?”
“They’ll be here shortly.” He steps to the edge of the spotlight and stops. “I asked for their help with all this, and they practically fell over themselves to assist me.”
My brain is working so hard to catch up, I can almost hear the cogs turning. “All this?” I ask faintly. “So there’snotgoing to be a reception do-over?”
Jasper holds out his hand to me. The movement seems to have a magnetic effect because before I’m even aware of what I’m doing, I’m standing in front of him. He gently clasps my hand and moves us into the center of the pool of light.
“There is, but not because the photographer’s pictures were ruined.” His fingers tighten around mine. It’s only now I realize he’s still holding my hand. Half of me wants to pull it away, while the other half wants to leap into his arms. I’m still too stunned to do either, so I allow him to continue holding my hand while I drink in his beautiful, familiar face.
“Let me start from the beginning,” he says. “I’m sorry I hurt you. Sorrier than I can say. Despite my almost-instant regret over ending things with you, I convinced myself I did the right thing. I fully believed what I said about you deserving better was true. I forced myself to leave Bellevue the morning after the wedding because I knew if I saw you, I’d ask you to disregard everything I’d said the night before and beg you to forgive me. I couldn’t do that, though; I had too many things to work on before being able to give myself to you fully.
“I’ve spent the last five weeks working on myself. I doubled my therapy sessions and allowed myself to dig deeper than I had before. I realized how much I had changed in my short time with you, largelybecauseof you. Being with you showed me how life could be, howIcould be. I thought of myself as an old dog incapable of learning new tricks, but that wasn’t true. Ididlearn new tricks, with the biggest one being how to love someone outside my immediate family.”
