Taking the seat across from him, I pick up my fork and spear some egg on it.The last time I had breakfast in this cabin was a little over a week ago with my dad.Our last time up here.It’s unreal how something so freaking mundane, a routine, can be an everlasting memory of what once was but never will be again.
I close my eyes and try to focus on something else.The fork slips from my hand and clatters on the plate.
“Everything okay?”Seamus murmurs and narrows his eyes at me.
Quickly wiping a tear from the corner of my eye, I shake my head and grab my fork.I shovel some food into my mouth to prevent talking while I stare at my plate.Nothing will be okay for a long time.Until I manage to find a time and place where a different kind of okay is right for me.
The song “World of Hurt” by Ilse DeLange fills the silence between us.Swallowing while your throat is clogged with emotion sucks.Yet, I’d rather be eating than using my voice.The way Seamus pushes for me to talk is more than frustrating, even more when I know my speech therapist would agree.
Some things we do, decisions we make to calm our minds and the restlessness inside us don’t need to be justified for others.It’s something my father told me when I struggled after the incident.He supported any choice I would make from here on out, even if it included me staying locked inside the house until the end of days.
My lips tug into a smile, remembering how he asked me to come with him for a ride the next day.I’m still glad I said yes because he took me to the ranch where Elodie works.The first step toward contact with the outside world again.Through animals, and a new friendship.
“Shit will get better,” Seamus states as he gets to his feet.“Thanks for breakfast.More coffee?”
He puts his plate in the sink and reaches for the coffeepot.I hold up my mug and he fills it.
“Cream?Sugar?”
I shake my head and reach for the cinnamon stick on my plate to stir my coffee.From the corner of my eye, I notice Seamus staring at me.He slowly takes a seat in front of me again and when I’m done stirring, he reaches over to take the cinnamon stick from me and places it in his coffee.
“Do you always add cinnamon?”he questions.
I shrug.Not always, but I do like the taste.He’s about to say something again when his phone gives a notification.He gets to his feet and rushes to his room.A moment later he stalks out with a gun in his hand.
“Stay here,” he grunts and gives me a pointed look.“I mean it, Jaxie.Stay the fuck inside this time.”
I give him a tight nod and get to my feet.I might stay inside, but I’m not going to sit around sipping coffee.My gun is still in my bedroom, and this surely is the wakeup call I need to start carrying my piece around, even when I’m inside the cabin.
Loud voices are coming from outside.It sounds like Seamus is arguing with someone.Keeping my aim forward, I slowly make my way to the window to glance outside.A man is standing in front of Seamus with a backpack slung over his shoulder.He’s big, like Seamus, muscled, but has a full beard.He’s also wearing a flannel shirt.
Seamus holsters his gun and with this move I assume the man in front of him isn’t a threat.I walk to the door and open it to glance at the two.Benny stays glued to my leg while Macy cheerfully greets the other man.
“I told you to stay inside,” Seamus snaps.
Gritting my teeth, I flip him off and walk back into the cabin while leaving the door open.
“Dude, you’re charming the panties right off her,” I hear the new guy state.
“Fuck off, Murray.Really, get the hell out of here.Why did you even show up here?”Seamus’s voice comes closer.
I watch both men along with Macy enter the cabin.Seamus closes the door behind them.
The new guy shrugs.“Heard a rumor the boss’s girl was up here all alone.Wanted to swing by to check if she’s okay.”
Seamus is clearly angry, and I’m also not really comfortable hearing this information.
My racing heart makes my eyes widen and I’m sure Seamus sees the panic and distress when he asks, “Murray, how exactly did you get that piece of information?”
Murray shrugs.“I overheard Burk and Royce talking this morning when I returned from an assignment.They were discussing Dax’s share in the company and how she’s now a co-owner.”
My heart is slamming against my ribs, and it feels as if I can’t breathe.Benny presses his head against my leg while I reach for the table to support myself.My father suspected Burk.The two of them are talking about my father’s shares, about me.Why the hell can’t everyone just leave me alone?
