Thea put down her coffee cup. “It will devastate Julia if her mother isn’t there. It can mean only one thing, that she has passed away.”
“If that is so, we shall have to find a way to help her. But now we need to talk, Thea, about us.”
Thea’s heart leapt. “Did you tell your grandfather about us? He didn’t mention it.”
“He doesn’t know.”
“I’m sorry, Ash. If I…”
His troubled gaze held hers, questioning. “Do you still want that, Thea?”
“No,” she said softly. “I deeply regret saying those words.”
“Why did you?”
She bit her lip. She wanted to tell him her reasons, how she feared he would come to feel trapped later, if he didn’t now; that thetonwould not consider her graceful enough to one day be a countess. But it didn’t seem to matter now. She wanted to be everything to him. And she would be. Her spirits soared. He still wanted to marry her. And she loved him. She wanted desperately to be his wife, come what may. Even if it wasn’t love which drove him to ask for her hand, she knew he desired her. Their marriage would be one of affection and friendship. “If you still wish to marry me, Ash. I would be honored to become your wife.”
“Thea, if there’s some obstacle, let us speak of it now…” he began.
She shook her head. “No. None.”
He smiled with evident relief. “I promise to make you happy, Thea.”
“I shall be happy, Ash. But you enjoy the work you do, and I expect you to continue with it.”
He raised an eyebrow. “What work would that be?”
“I don’t expect you to tell me now. But I hope one day you will.”
“One day, you might tell me what you hoped for, for yourself. There is something, Thea, I’ve always suspected it.”
She kept silent, fearing he would laugh at her and spoil the intimacy which had sprung up between them. Could she really become a published writer? The dream had faded into the background with everything that had happened. But what a story this would make. And it wasn’t over yet. “Where is Farnborough? Will he be waiting at the hunting lodge?”
Ash put an arm around her. “No. I doubt he ever intended to return there. But don’t worry, I’ll find him.”
Thea didn’t want to think about that now. She stared into the crackling fire and leaned against Ash, listening to the rumble of his voice in his chest and the beating of his heart, while he discussed their trip to Cambridgeshire. Ash’s proximity usually unsettled her, but she felt deliciously languid to be safe at last. She closed her eyes.
“Thea,” she heard him whisper. Then, with a soft laugh, he gathered her up in his arms.
“To bed, my sweet.”
“Yes, sorry, Ash… I am a little tired.”
“You are the bravest woman I have ever known.”
She shook her head and murmured, “No, Julia is.”
Ash carried her up the stairs. Although her head was a little woolly, she could have walked, but how much more pleasant was this? She enjoyed his strength, his chivalry. And she was so tired, she could have slept in his arms. Vaguely aware when he opened her bedchamber door, she stared blearily into the flickering candlelight as he carried her across to her bed.
He gently laid her down.
Did he brush his mouth over her lips, or did she just merely wish it?
He moved away from her. Thea heard him say he’d send a maid to help her undress. Then the door closed behind him, and the room seemed too quiet and empty.
He might have stayed to undress her.
Such a shocking thought brought her fully awake and up on her elbows as the maid came in.
