“You are interested in my first wife.” Nathaniel sounded exhausted. “I should tell you more.” He passed his hand over his eyes. “I will tell you more, Laura. Just not now.”
Guilt heated her cheeks. She should have waited for Nathaniel to show it to her. His hair was wet, and she longed to move closer, to lean her head against his shoulder and learn what troubled him, but she seemed frozen on the sofa. “What called you out in this dreadful weather?”
“An estate matter. I’m sorry I was not able to dine with you.”
“I can’t imagine what would require your attention so late.”
“Any number of things.” His dark eyebrows snapped together. “Running an estate this size doesn’t fit neatly into normal business hours.”
Noting the edge to his voice, Laura gave up. She rose. “You should eat, Nathaniel. Would you like me to arrange for a tray to be brought?”
“Thank you, but I’m not hungry.”
It seemed they both had lost their appetites. “I believe I shall retire.”
He raised his head to look at her. “You’re tired?”
“Yes, a little.”
In truth, she quivered with nervous exhaustion. Suddenly, the long day without a shred of affection from Nathaniel overwhelmed her. How could she compete with Nathaniel’s memories of a beloved wife, who would stay forever young and lovely? Life here proved so confusing, so hard to grasp hold of, with a secretive, distracted, uncommunicative husband and a butler who measured her poorly against his previous mistress. Was it an impossible task to make Wolfram her home? But what choice did shehave?
Nathaniel stared at the half-glass of amber liquid. “I’ll follow you up in a little while.”
Upstairs, Laura donned a modest nightgown buttoned up to a high collar and dismissed Agnes. She tried to still her anxious thoughts. Hating that she was so unsure of herself and her position here, tears flooded her eyes. Where was her eager lover now? She climbed into bed. Had she failed so miserably? Did he no longer desireher?
The clock on the mantelpiece ticked away thehour.
***
Nathaniel stared into the fire, which crumbled into orange sparks as it died. Laura’s curiosity concerning Amanda was understandable. Yet, how could he explain, put into words what had taken place here and not have her doubt him, as so many others had done?
His tired mind tried to come to grips with what he’d discovered and who might be behind it. When smugglers targeted Wolfram two years ago, Ben Jerkins, who worked at the home farm, had been arrested and hung along with four other men from the village. Although Nathaniel was sure Mallory was behind it, there was no proof, and his head gardener had disappeared soon after Amanda died.
At the time, Nathaniel had been glad to see the back of him. In a murderous mood, he was sorely tempted to deal with the man personally. As the villagers turned their backs on Nathaniel, he discovered that Mallory’s parting gift was to spread hateful lies accusing Nathaniel of murderingAmanda.
Nathaniel had hired an investigator to keep tabs on him, and to make sure that if Mallory ever set foot again in Wolfram, he’d be ready forhim.
Mallory’s villainy still affected him and would continue to do so while some believed Nathaniel to be a murderer. There wasn’t a damn thing he could do about it. The familiar horror rolled over him, and he took a long swallow of brandy. He felt incapable of dealing with it. The very thought of his wife with a man such as Mallory made him ill. Had Mallory used Amanda? And after she made demands of him, had he killed her, fearing she might give him up to the police? Nathaniel wished he could find out thetruth.
He would have to inform the Customs and excise investigators in London about this new outrage. He found very few he could trust. There was no saying who might be involved. Upstairs Laura waited for him, and he tried to banish his concerns from his mind before he went to her.
Until these people were behind bars Laura would need to be protected. He would not sleep until all this was at an end, and the lack of it was taking a toll on his temper. But tired as he was, his need for her drew him to his feet. Her lovely face, her warm voice and lush curves, her silky skin beneath his hands, her hands on him. Laura’s innocence and honesty made him crave to be the man she thought she married. He couldn’t bear the thought of living without her, yet would she want to remain here? Or would she begin to gaze at him with suspicion? He didn’t think he could bear it if shedid.
Reaching the upper corridor, he slowed his steps toward her door. Every night he urged himself to take a chance. To respond to her obvious need to understand him. And each night he pushed it away. He knew he would fail again tonight.
Chapter Eleven
The panel slid back. Laura’s heart leapt at the sight of him, as it always did. He threw off his robe, and the candlelight played lovingly over his strong, naked body, muscles rippling beneath olive skin. Pulling back the covers, he climbed in beside her. His skin was cool against hers as he gathered her up in his arms and pressed a kiss against herneck.
“You’re so warm, and you smell wonderful, sweetheart.”
Laura slid helplessly toward desire. Her body had come to expect it and now demanded the sensations only his lips, hands and body could produce. No matter how desperate she was to confront him, the touch of his mouth on hers, probing and insistent, sent every thought skittering away. Only one sure thought remained. When he entered her she cried out in joy, relishing the opportunity to be affectionate and give him all her love, even though he might not returnit.
Nathaniel lay beside her, and she heard him sigh. She raised her head on an elbow. “Darling, what is it? What worries you so?”
“Estate matters. And I have to travel up to London this Friday; I’ll be there for a week.”
Her heart sank. “I thought the next trip was some weeks away.”
